Never Drink Alone

[Rob Snow]

The comment actually had Rob laughing, and not quietly. He actually had to duck his head down to stop the laughter from being too obnoxious. was the joke that funny? Not especially. It had just been the flat way that Roxana had said it, stating a fact just like that, which caught Rob by surprise and had him laughing. he let it out as the talk continued to whatever saddened her.

Correction: whatever bothered her mind. A raised brow, and an insistence that she was perfectly fine, along with an explanation. Some awful part of Rob took note that this involved two girls, which might explain why she wasn't interested in him. Or she's just wrapped up in unrequited love, ye git he sent through his brain matter for a moment, almost forcing his thoughts away from the stupid friend-zone type mansplaining.

"You know what I find works?" he offered. "Working it out through art. Lets you get the feelings out without specifics. You mentioned being an artist, aye?" He nodded. "Get some sort of piece and start thinking about your two lovelies. Or do one apiece," he shrugged, "whichever makes the hands move easier. Helps ya think and process and all that good stuff without having to talk to some annoying redhead gob in the middle of a pub."

[Roxana Strix]

He was laughing. Was he one of those people that thought that STDS were not real and some kind of government trick or parent bedtime story to keep kids from sleeping with one another before marriage? Or was he one of those people that had one and was laughing because he was nervous and trying to play it off like he did not have one? A simple blood test would let her know. Yet, it could be none of those things which meant that Roxana didn't get why he was laughing. She didn't make a confused look. This look was more of a not amused face as she just stared at him as he worked on getting his laugh under control.

She had missed whatever had been so funny and she was pretty sure she did not have the gift of being a comedian. Roxana wanted to leave at any rate; she didn't want to be here. She didn't want to talk about such things. She didn't want to drink until she was drunk; it was something she did on rare occasions. Very rare. Yet, eh was still talking to her. This caused her to pause in her movement and turn around and look at him. She was not at the point of feeling like she needed to be rude and just walk out on him when he was talking to her. He made a suggestion, as if she had not already tried that, and even gave his own little personal opinion on the matter.

"I'm doing that already, and not by choice. I can't get them off of my mind. They are taking up my thoughts, my art, my skills, and in general getting in the way of things I need to do. These feelings are ineffective, they are foolish, and a waste of time. There is not point for me to be...obsessing over them when they feel nothing towards me. When I barely understand what I feel towards them." Roxana said. She actually was saying a lot there with a hint of anger...or perhaps frustration in her voice. She closed her eyes for a moment; think to what her father said before glaring a little at Rob. "Why do you even want to discuss such things? You should have loss interest after I told you I'm not having sex with you." Roxana said, blunt as usual.

[Rob Snow]

Already doing that, and Rob could hear the frustration. Here was someone who had been told her whole life to beat down emotions and not let them roam free or take control. Probably had a military upbringing or something equally strict, Catholic also made a good deal of sense. There was something in there about skills that made Rob lean a bit more toward military than anything else; the accent might have helped there too, but as someone who'd actually visited Eastern European countries he knew better than to paint all the people there with the same brush.

Frustration, anger, he heard all that in there to fuel things further. "Sounds like the human condition all over," he replied with some sympathy, rolling his hand. A glare met his eyes, stopping further words and making him look at the glare's owner with some surprise.

"Why, that's offensive," he said, pointing with the finger. "Accusing a mate of thinking of nothing but what his willy's wanting. some of us are human beings and care about the emotional stability of our fellow man," Rob nodded confidently and then tapped the counter again. "Should also point out that this is clearly bothering you more than you let on, since you're spittin' words out at a near stranger and all. Affection'll do that to a person, especially if you try to push it down or kill it with fire."

[Roxana Strix]

If Roxana could read minds, she would have at least known that Rob was pretty close to understanding the life that she had to deal with. Yet, he really had no idea. Yes, life for her could be compared to that of a kid growing up in a military or very strict religious family but this was different. This was a family of those who did jobs that others would not be able to mentally handle after a period of time without it changing the way they viewed human life. It was why everyone in her family was a little off, but only in ways that made it hard for others to relate to them.

The Strix family members didn't need people to relate to them, they just needed to live normal lives when they were not doing what each of them was born and raised to do. That was simple enough, even for Roxana. She could function among those who were 'normal' but with some small difficulties here and there but none that made it impossible for her to survive and act like she was one of them. His words did not help her mood, which meant that the glare was not going away. Then he was taking offense, which she did half expect. She had not exactly been kind with her words but her mood had quickly changed.

"My apologies. You are right. I should not say such things, but it is a result of my frustration. Yet, that is still not a good enough excuse." Roxana apologized and even bowed her head a little for the added effect of her apology. He spoke of how it was bothering her more than she was letting on, which she was well aware of. She was not supposed to be letting anything on, that was why it was a problem. "I know that. I just don't know what to do in order to get rid of these...feelings. They are useless to me." Roxana responded, half under her breath. Her farther would not allow her to be corrected, when she had even asked for it.

It was not like she liked pain, it helped her learn. She needed it and she was convinced it was the only way to solve this problem. Yet, her father saw it differently and perhaps this was a test to make her stronger or to get her to break and show that she was not good enough. What did they want from her? "Any suggestions?" Roxana went ahead and asked after thinking over it for a short moment. He could either tell her of how to get rid of these feelings or not, and if not she planned to leave because staying any longer was a waste of time.

[Rob Snow]

"Well, nothing wrong with venting yourself from time to time," Rob allowed, nodding his head slightly. "Is what most artists of our stripe have a tendency toward doing. What I do in my voice and what I suggested you do in your art." He stopped to consider a moment though. Were there ways of getting rid of certain feelings? Hadn't that been a question that sages had been asking of one another for ages? Rob was tempted to say as much himself, but instead waited, listening, considering the puzzling young woman in front of him.

she looked to him and asked point blank. He blinked at her, unable to hide his surprise at her bluntness, not to mention the opening that it technically left. He leaned back slightly, drummed his hands on the counter, took a deep breath, and released it slowly, all the while considering, racking his brain for a few moments.

"Already mentioned working them out through your art," he said, tapping the bar with one finger. "There's always drinking away your problems, 'cept that's got some issues," Rob made a quick gesture around the room before tapping two fingers on the bar, "there's always overriding it with some other emotions, filling yourself up. Sometimes works," another finger tapped, "and of course you could try going all out, overdose yourself on the emotion, see what happens."

Rob considered again, tapping fingers a few more time. "Sometimes it helps to just sort of wallow in it though. Let it pour over and seep into your being. Hell, some of these,' he held out his arms to show off the tattoos, "are symbols of seeped in emotion," he lowered them, looking to her, "just because we don't fancy something at the time doesn't mean it's not something that can help shape us."

[Roxana Strix]

Rob said that there was nothing wrong with venting yourself from time to time and while Roxana supposed that was right in some situations, she didn't think so in her case. For her, venting was either done through her art or in her work. When it came to her work, that meant that people died in a not so painless way and would instead suffer. So those that suffered when Roxana was not in the best of moods would disagree with Rob on that whole venting things. "I still should not have taken it out on you, no matter if it is okay or not." Roxana responded and there was no way he was going to change her mind on it.

She should not have snapped on him and it just made it all the more clear that she was really effected by this and also that sleep was probably going to be the best medicine right now. She asked him if there were ways, meaning other then what they both already did. Other ways. He didn't seem to know the answer by how he had nothing to say at first. Roxana still waited, since it also did seem like he was thinking and possibly gathering his thoughts on what worked for him or what he knew would possibly work for her. He spoke of how he had already said one thing that Roxana, then went on with his list.

There was drinking, but that came with some problems. There was trying to cover it with another emotion...what other emotion could she use? Then there was...overdosing on it? What did he mean by that? How were you supposed to over does yourself with an emotion when those involving the emotion did not feel the same in order for you to get your feel of the emotion. She didn't understand yet again what he was getting at. She didn't say anything however she just remained silent as he gave another suggestion that she thought was foolish. She was already having the problem of wallowing in it when she wanted to get out of it. He held out his arm, showing tattoos and saying that was how he wallowed in it in a symbolic way.

In other words, I should get a tattoo? Roxana asked herself as she thought about it. Overall, she didn't see any of his suggestion helping but that was vastly because she didn't fully understand some if not all of them or at the very least how to go about them. His last point had her thinking but once again she did not see how this feeling could help shape her for the better. "Caring for someone like this...it makes you weak, especially if they don't feel the same way about you. If they were returned in the slightest then perhaps I could understand how they are good because it gives you something to fight for, motivation, passion, and so on depending on how it is for you." Roxana said, and then paused for a moment.

"Yet, when there is nothing there for you...how is it...it’s not helpful." Roxana said, her hands curling into fist as she could feel crystal forming on her palms. Was she really so unbalanced by this all? She hated it, actually loathed it.

[Rob Snow]

Rob simply chuckled and shook his head as Roxana insisted that she shouldn't have taken it out on him. He supposed she was more or less right: he was just a willing ear, an innocent bystander in whatever drama was going on over there. Still, he had asked for it. Well, he knew what to say: "I'll accept it for all the apologies I should've gotten over the years." Then he saluted her with his drink before lowering it again.

His advice came out easily enough, and he could tell the girl was listening to it. He supposed that should make him feel odd too: generally people didn't take advice from ginger barflys that had made it clear they wanted to dance the sheet tango. However, Roxana did seem to want someone to tell her precisely what to do. Again,the idea of her being military raised popped into Rob's head and again he just sort of patted the idea on the metaphorical head and sent it to the corner.

She finally spoke, and it was Rob's turn to listen. she insisted it made her weak. especially if it was unreturned. Rob swirled his drink, considering. "You know," he said, again somewhat speculatively, "I seem to remember a bunch of legends," he looked to her, "mostly from my fine homeland. God save the queen," he saluted again and took another drink before setting the near empty glass on the counter, once more tapping the lid, "about unrequited love. Bits about how knights loved their liege ladies but couldn't do shit about it on account of their being warriors." Rob tapped his fingers on the glass, that military memory coming back. "Nobody says that love's a two-way street, and sometimes unrequited love ends up being the stuff of stories and legends. Is what I'm saying," he favored her with another smile, this one saying "and ain't that the shit?"

[Roxana Strix]

He accepted her apology, but said it in a way that meant it more like he was only accepting it because of all the apologies he was owed by others but never got. Clearly he had been up to certain things or was not careful about who he choose to interact with if that was the case. Roxana didn't say anything on it, it was not her business. She had said it for herself, but how he decided to take or not take it was completely up to him. There was advice that he was giving that held far more interest right now, even if she did not agree or fully understand all of it.

True it was odd to be getting advice from someone like this guy, but the feelings she had were odd. Who better to get advice on such things you didn't understand then from someone that seemed to at least have a decent amount of knowledge in the area? She did need orders; practically craved them for such a thing but even her farther and organization would not give her any. Again she assumed this was a test to see if such a simple thing would be enough to break her or not, but she really didn't know. She didn't want to have to keep dealing with anymore, it was a waste of time and she wished she could remove the feelings and desire out of her physically.

She didn't say anything as Rob went on to talk about legends and how the stories would go about a knight loving someone who did not return their love or because they were warriors. She knew that love was not a two way street, that was pretty obvious or she would not have been having this conversation with him right now. Things would also be a lot more complicated for other reasons if love was a two way street. His end comment about how it was the ones without the good ending of both loving one another that were made into legends. "That does not help. I don't desire to be a legend. I desire to not feel so useless emotions in the first place." Roxana responded, her tone going cold again before she let out a small sigh.

"Thank you for your...help. Don't drink yourself sick and farewell." Roxana said as she placed some money down for Rob's drinks as well and then this time really went ahead and left. Going out the door and debating if she was going to drive back or have someone come pick her up. Either way it didn't matter, she was gone and planned to go back to her room to try and get some much needed rest.

[Rob Snow]

"More a matter of doing--' Rob tried, but he could tell that Roxana had already said what she was going to say. She'd managed to work herself up with the whole thing, winding tighter and tighter until she looked about ready to snap. A part of Rob did consider cranking just a bit tighter to see everything come to pieces, and that part acknowledged that often a girl was easier to seduce when she'd been reduced to that state. Naturally he beat that part down and dragged it back into the dark corner of his mind.

"Well, you're just ruining all m'fun," Rob replied gamely, he added a wink and another salute. Money hit the table and Rob considered it for a moment. She really didn't want him to buy her drinks at all, did she? Rob turned back, watching her go, considering. There was definitely a song here: his mind had already begun spinning the tune, but he knew better than to follow here. There was a thin line between interested and stalking, one that Rob had no intention of following.

So instead he pushed the money over, told the bartender to keep the change, and gathered his own things to exit. If nothing else, he definitely had a song that needed writing.