Holding On For Dear Life

[Zoe Wallerstein-Smythe]

"Well..." Well, it did seem as though Zoe's and Alice's families were equally rough, didn't it? Zoe hadn't even spoken with hers in almost a year now, whereas Alice seemed to fight hers or be worried about them. All Zoe knew for certain was that neither really enjoyed discussing their families, that sore spot.

that's what you want..."
not going to lie"

Zoe waited again as Alice kept going. She took Alice's hands in hers, giving them a squeeze before moving her head to make sure that she was looking Alice in the eye. "I don't want to push you, remember?" she said, her voice soft even for Zoe. "I didn't mean to... to suggest that you needed to. We can wait till you have the house to yourself or maybe we can just use the kitchen here. I've heard that some students use it to make food on their own, and I'm sure we could just ask one of the cooks for some time."

Zoe gave Alice's hands a squeeze, rubbing at the backs with her thumbs.

[Alice Hobbs]

"No, no," she said as her head shook. "I'm fine with it. I just don't--" she stopped and looked at Zoe. She even smiled at the squeeze. "I wouldn't want you to be in a situation that would make you uncomfortable." She knew that Zoe wasn't weak. The girl had been through so much already. But Alice's father was... Well, to put it nicely; a drunkard. It wasn't everyone's cup of tea. Molly, Alice's sister was as eccentric as someone could get. The whole family appeared surrealistic to outsiders, because they were so incredibly different. It was almost hilarious.

"I want you there," she added. She furrowed her brows then as she sighed. She wasn't sure what else to say. She didn't want to put Zoe through something she either didn't want to, or was ready for.

It wasn't that Alice's father was mean or cruel, or abused any of his children. But the amount of alcohol he could get in his system and the way it affected him, along with some of the things he often said, it could make just about anyone feel the need to run away.

[Zoe Wallerstein-Smythe]

Was Alice fine with it? Or was she just saying she was? Were this anyone else, Zoe would just automatically assume the latter. Most people were willing to do whatever it took to make people feel better, after all. But Alice had always insisted that she was going to be honest, and she'd been blisteringly so up till now so...

so Zoe didn't see as though she had any other option but to take Alice at her word.

"Right," Zoe said. She leaned up and gave Alice a light kiss on the cheek. "I'll make sure to be there. Just let me know when, okay?" Zoe gave Alice's hands a light squeeze, nodding again. "Oh, and you should probably let me know if, um," Zoe flushed, "I should, ah," the flush seemed to deepen, "dress a certain way. I don't want to," now her eyes were lowering, "embarrass you, or anything..."

Because Zoe already figured that having Alice bring her home was going to be awkward. It always seemed so awkward in the media when you were like here's the person I love, family: another member of the same sex! Add on Alice's obvious reluctance...

[Alice Hobbs]

Alice actually felt a little relieved that Zoe so easily ended the conversation by agreeing. She nodded then, a quick, but firm nod. She even smiled a little and flushed as Zoe kissed her cheek. "Embarrass me?" Alice asked as she looked at the other girl for a moment. Her brows furrowed. Why would anything Zoe ever wore embarrass Alice?

"Nah, my family's not big on that stuff. I mean, I was raised by my dad after all, and his sense of fashion mostly results in button up shirts and old jeans," she added with a shrug. No, her family was ordinary with things like that. In fact, the only thing that wasn't normal was the fact that her father liked alcohol a little too much.

Well, that and the fact that her mother had just left.

"Just..." Alice licked her bottom lip and averted her gaze. "Just be prepared okay?" She looked back at Zoe as she shifted. "The drinking... He uh- my dad, it can be a little..." she trailed off with a shrug. Alice figured that Zoe probably would be able to handle it just well, but she wanted to make sure. She didn't want to scare her off. Not now. Not after everything.

[Zoe Wallerstein-Smythe]

The repetition of the embarrassment statement had Zoe flushing and lowering her eyes. She wanted to repeat the words, to reaffirm that yes, she definitely thought that she might embarrass her girlfriend in front of her family. Though Alice was already insisting that Zoe didn't have to worry, at least about dress. Of course, that only made Zoe start to worry even worse than she had before, though she wasn't about to let Alice know that as of yet.

Be prepared? Zoe looked back up, meeting Alice's eyes. "Alice," she said, speaking softly, "I've had people... people shoot at me, remember?" She smiled and added a slight shrug. "I can... I can probably handle my girlfriend's father."

Probably. though Zoe could also already see herself being reduced to tears by cutting comments or something like that. Well, this was part of Alice, and as Zoe kept saying: she loved all of Alice. She could certainly do this.

"I'm..." she said, swallowing, "I'm still not great at the whole," she gestured for a moment as if she could knock the words out of the air, "eating, thing." Zoe flushed, shuffling her feet again. As if her tiny frame didn't already indicate as much.

[Alice Hobbs]

A sheepish smile formed on Alice's lips and she nodded quickly, as if to say 'of course, duh'. Alice didn't push the subject any further either. If Zoe thought she could handle it, then Alice would believe her, and if it was as horrible as Alice feared it would be, they could always leave and do something else. Besides, it was a nice for Alice to let Zoe in and show her her world. Show her her room, old photos and things like that - which Alice had never thought she'd share with anyone, and here she was, wanting to. "Alright. It's a date then."

"When are you free?" she then asked with a tilted head. "I don't work this week, or the next, so I'm available whenever." She smiled a little at that. Juggling a relationship, school and a job was getting easier as she got more used to it. It was actually kind of nice too.

Putting her arm around Zoe's shoulder, Alice pulled her in for a sideway hug. "Sounds to me like I have to cook for you more often then." The fact that Zoe was rather thing hadn't passed Alice by, but she had never really questioned it. And it wasn't like she thought that Zoe had an eating disorder or something. Some people were just naturally thinner than others. It was almost a little funny, seeing the two of the next to each other, as Alice was clearly bigger and had a lot more meat on her bones. Which was a result of years spending time in front of the stove.

[Zoe Wallerstein-Smythe]

Zoe smiled wide as Alice insisted it was another date. She couldn't help but get little tummy butterflies with the words like that. A date, with Alice, with this beautiful, amazing, strong woman with her blunt words and her take-no-prisoners attitude. Sometimes it really did seem like Zoe was just living out some sort of dream.

"Well, there's the show," Zoe admitted, chewing at her inner cheek for a moment, "but that doesn't go too late. I could meet you after that..." which seemed to be the best time. Zoe nodded, turning to Alice, only to find the girl pulling her in for a hug.

Zoe flushed, feeling her heart again flutter as Alice pulled her close. It was just grossly unfair, how Alice could dishevel Zoe so easily while Zoe often couldn't get a reaction if she tried. It didn't help that her flush showed all too clearly on her pale cheeks.

"I'd like that," she admitted, leaning in to Alice, taking another breath. "Gives me an excuse to spend more time with you," she added, looking up at her girlfriend. For most, that would sound like some kind of joke, or a tease. Zoe said it with the utmost sincerity, as if she didn't even consider the possible teasing ramifications.

[Alice Hobbs]

"After the show?" Alice asked, pursing her lips as she contemplated it. After a few seconds, she finally nodded in agreement. "That would work." She'd probably be nervous as all hell and on edge from the moment they walked through the doors, but Alice also realized that she really needed to have more faith in Zoe and actually trust that she could handle this, because in truth, Zoe was a lot more confident and brave than what she gave herself credit for. It was just all hidden behind this incredibly beautiful and adorable appearance.

Lacing her arm around the slender girl's from, Alice chuckled. "As if you need an excuse, but I'll take it," she smiled at her. Alice didn't mind at all. She loved cooking. Especially for people she cared about and that actually appreciated her skills. Unlike her father who took it for granted and her sister that barely had the time to actually get out of bed in the morning.

Kissing the top of Zoe's head, Alice pulled away. "I should probably get going, but I'm glad we got all that sorted out," she said, the smile still clinging to her lips like never before. "Text me." With that, Alice placed a chaste kiss upon Zoe's lips before pulling back further.

[Zoe Wallerstein-Smythe]

Zoe nodded, reconfirming. After the show. Zoe could certainly handle this: she knew she could. She'd gone through worse, and this was part of being with Alice. Plus: she's letting me meet her family. That means we're getting serious, right? Oh God, don't let her know that. Or should I let her know that? Should I bring it up? Does Alice see that as us being more serious? Yes, that's usually what that means, but Alice doesn't always see things the same usual ways. I love that about her but...

Zoe smiled at Alice's chuckle, pushing back her own feelings (and doing a horrible job of it). She felt a kiss on her head, felt Alice pulling away, and was almost relieved, knowing she'd need some time to sort through things herself.

"Yes, I do have a bit more work to do. I'll see you later," Zoe insisted. She leaned forward and kissed her girlfriend back. Then she smiled and nodded, watching Alice move away before turning back to her work.

[Alice Hobbs]

Alice did notice the flash of uncertainty running past Zoe's gaze, but for once, Alice opted not to poke at it. She figured that if it was something Zoe really wanted to discuss, she'd let her now. So, instead, the brunette let the girl sort through it on her own; she didn't want to be the pushy kind of girlfriend that didn't offer her any space to grow and figure out things on her own. That would go against everything Alice had ever told Zoe about growing stronger for herself without constantly needing someone to rely on.

"Don't work yourself to death," Alice winked. "See you around." With that, Alice offered Zoe a quick glance over her shoulder before she finally moved towards and through the door. She had some cook books that now needed a lot of looking through.

She had to figure out what to make for their little date. She wondered what would go well with that one dessert she had read about the other day. She had to make sure the two didn't clash with another, because everything had to be perfect. It just had to.