Never Really Get It Right

[Tamara Sulik]

Tamara felt sorry for Devyn. She knew how some powers can be hard to control. She never had that problem with hers as being out of focus caused her power not to work and not going out of control like the girl but that didn’t stop Tamara from feeling sorry for Devyn. It was hard enough to be a teenager, harder when you had to add some power difficult to handle, there really was no need to add some drama on top of it all. She didn't know exactly what happened to put the girl in that state, what caused her relationship to end and frankly it didn’t matter. Relationships were just meant to end at some point, especially at her age. Tamara never really trusted you could find true love in high school and never be with anyone after that. Apparently there were some exceptions but that was just what they were, exceptions.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” she replied as Devyn told her to lock her up should her power go out of hand. From yelling at her to snap out of it, they ended up locking her. Of course, if she needed to call security to help her, she might do that but Tamara hated asking for help without trying on her own first. She would see how she can handle Devyn, if she ever had to, then she would advise whether or not she should call a member of the security staff next time. She would also stay awake and somewhat near her until she was no longer into her shadow form, to make sure she was alright. She knew she couldn’t do any other way. There was a maternal streak in Tamara, despite how well hidden it was to the world, and since her son was far away from her, she was ready to use it by making sure the students were safe. Her maternal streak didn't stretch further than that however.

Tamara wasn’t sure if she should frown or laugh as the girl’s apology and both expressions seemed to battle to see which one would show on her traits for a moment. “It’s my job to watch over you. Don’t worry about it and focus on yourself for now,” she told her. Something that she assumed wouldn’t be too hard as kids were so self-centered usually.

[Devyn Solway]

Devyn didn't want people to feel sorry for her, she wanted people to understand her and how she thought. She wanted someone to just care and honestly she wanted help with knowing what she was supposed to do in order to get Zoe back. If she could not have Zoe as a girlfriend she at least needed her as friend, but she didn't know how. How did you just go from loving someone to just being their friend because they no longer wanted you? Devyn honestly didn't know if she could do such a thing but she practically needed Zoe in her life or at least felt like she did. She honestly didn't know anything anymore, she just felt so loss, and wanted it to end.

She wanted the pain, the feelings, and just her pathetic feelings to all end. It was a dark thought, but it was there, and she was not going to deny that she was thinking such things. "Good, don't be afraid to be a little rough with me. I feel pain but its only relative since the pain is more of like a mental illusion when it’s happening to my other form. It's basically like armor so if you hit me, make it a good hit." Devyn pointed out, giving a bit more about her power but stopped there. She didn't want someone to know all of her weakness with her power, even if there were a few people that already did. Devyn would not really understand Tamara's motherly instinct; her mother was less of a mom and more of a...bad person. So she actually never related women to being motherly, ever. It was always just guys that she saw as fatherly because she didn't know what a motherly woman was supposed to be like.

Perhaps one day she would, when she was older but by then she would not really need a mother. She didn't even really need her mother that much now. Devyn only dealt with her mom because it was her only way of getting money and things from home. When she would turn eighteen, she would no longer need her completely. Devyn just knew that she would be a good mom, better than her mom ever was to her. She did plan on being a mother one day, even if she had to adopt. "Got it." Devyn said with a small nod as she scratched at her head a little. Looking to the door and then Tamara. "Can I go now?" Devyn then asked, not wanting to waste anymore of the women's time. Even if Tamara said it was okay with having Devyn around, she still felt like she was taking up the women’s time.

[Tamara Sulik]

Tamara really couldn’t understand why they kept sending her students like this. She was ready to watch over them and make sure they wouldn’t get hurt if they feared they could be a danger to themselves or others but why did they have to send them over first? She didn't want to hear them explain how the love of their life left them and how their whole existence made no sense. Were all teenagers this dramatic? Had she been like that not that long ago? She refused to believe it but at the same time she feared any adult who knew her from school would tell her that she was acting like this.

She personally wasn’t good with that kind of attitude. She just wanted to shake Devyn up and tell her how ridiculous it was to think her life ended just because her girlfriend dumped her. She knew it would be useless and might even make the matters worse. But she couldn’t pretend that she was ready to give her a hug or talk of her problem over ice cream or something. “I don’t intend to hit you but I’ll try to keep that in mind,” she said. Part of her was tempted to check out who was this ex-girlfriend of hers so she could maybe create an image of her but the results would be too unpredictable and it was a risk she was not ready to take. She also didn’t want to cause more pain to the girl that what she was already going through. She might want to stop her, if she ever had to get to that, but there was a limit on what she was ready to achieve this.

She couldn’t blame her for wanting to leave and since Tamara wasn’t quite sure what else they might want her to ask, she simply nodded. “And Devyn’” she called her out before she left. “Don’t let this make you see everything in black and white. Sass is a lot more appealing.” She doubted it was a good advice but Devyn already turned down the whole time heals all wounds speech and Tamara wasn’t really feling for repeating something like that again.

[Devyn Solway]

Devyn knew that she was probably being a bit dramatic about it all, and that was why she hated having to come to Tamara for it. She didn’t want anyone to have to deal with her when she was like this and felt it was unfair to them. It was not like they would understand her specific situation and no one was ever really of much help. Everyone just told her to move on, not to think about it, and that there were be more to go for later on her life. She knew that, but it was still hard for her to just accept that someone that she had finally come to truly love didn’t feel the same anymore.

Part of Devyn wondered if it was a werewolf thing with the whole ‘mates’ for life’ type deal but didn’t think too much on it. If Tamara actually shook her, it actually would have probably helped on some level because Devyn was very physical. A good punch or a shake would probably be a nice little wake up call to get her back to reality. Not that any seemed to be willing to risk someone that was clearly as intimidating as she was. Still, Devyn did slightly appreciate that Tamara was at least trying instead of just looking at her like she was crazy. Devyn gave a small chuckle when Tamara said she would not hit her but would keep in mind. “We will see when and if the moment comes.” Devyn said simply as she headed for the door then.

She figured they were done here and her depression was not really doing any better than it was when she came in here. She probably was just going to go cook up some bacon, eat it, do a little workout, and then take a nap. Naps tended to help out a lot, especially because moving around and doing things in the day time always seemed to take a drain on her. She figured it was because of her power that she just did better at night time, but in this world humans mostly had to live in the daylight. Devyn did stop when Tamara called to her, looking back over her shoulder. Devyn did chuckle then, smiling a little bit at Tamara’s words. They were not awe inspiring or anything like that, but they did pick up her spirits a little bit. “Thanks Miss…er, Tamara. I’ll keep that in mind.” Devyn said as she opened the door to head out.

“Next time I’ll be bold and ask you on a date then, yeah?” Devyn asked as she gave Tamara a wink with her classic ‘up to something smirk’ and headed out.

[Tamara Sulik]

If Tamara ever looked in her past, she would say she had never really been in love. She did love some people, she wanted to be with them, to stay close to them and all that but she never felt like she would die if she had to get away from someone. Tamara didn’t want anyone to mean that much to her. Well, there was one person who did. Mikael. Of course, the love she had for her son was not the same as to what Devyn felt for her girlfriend, that would be too gross, but it was love and he ought to be the only person who really mattered to her. She was ready to kill and die for him and it would be the greatest torture for her if he had to be taken from her. It was painful not to have him around but she knew he was safe with her parents and she could still talk to him through webcams. If she didn’t have this, she might just go crazy.

She tried to chase that ominous thought away by focusing on Devyn. She supposed hitting the girl might help but it was also the solution to take when everything else didn’t work. Tamara preferred having someone fetch Guy or any other power suppressor than to physically hurt her. She knew what she said to Devyn wasn’t all that inspiring. It was just yet another thing she probably couldn’t care less about. But she got a little smirk so there was the proof she could get over it at some point. “I know it’s hard, having to say goodbye to someone that means a lot to you. It’s heartbreaking and we have no control over it. What you have control on however is your power, so don’t lose that too,” she told the girl. There was some sadness in the woman’s eyes as she thought about leaving someone behind. Again, she thought it might not be the best thing to say to Devyn. Teenagers tended to think they were the only ones who could understand their pain, as if the adults were too old to get it or something.

Tam had a little smirk back at the girl’s words. She should stop her from doing anything of the like. The only reason she was not right now was because she doubted Devyn was serious. “I get that some say the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else but I think you need to pick someone more of your age,” she replied. She was not lecturing Devyn, in fact, she was kindly mocking the whole ‘asking you out on a date’ thing. As soon as Devyn headed out, Tam returned to the computer and read the girl’s file, so she would be prepared if anything happened.