Wrong Club Chris

[Chris Grayson]

”Trust me lady, I’m definitely not too drunk.” Chris argued with the bartender. ”If I was too drunk then I’d not wanna drink anymore. I do so’s that means I’m not too drunk!”

Despite his best argument, Chris wasn’t getting any more alcohol anytime soon. Waving off the woman working the bar, Chris returned to the dance floor. Had Chris been in a better state of mind he may have noticed that all the dancers were female. He may have also thought twice before turning into a lesbian bar after he’d been drinking elsewhere. As it was now, he had already been in Tink’s for a good amount of time. His sober self would’ve been surprised at how tolerate the patrons and workers of the club were being towards him since he wasn’t exactly of the right sex to really be in there. However he’d made no other move but to dance, drink, and enjoy himself for the most part so he wasn’t much trouble.

”Tellin’ me I had ‘nough. She ain’t my mam.”

Chris snorted and went back to dancing for a little bit. Eventually his feet were tired so he dragged himself off to somewhere to sit and slumped down. Although as he did he didn’t notice the table was already taken. When he did he blinked a few times and then squinted.

”What da’fuq’re you doin’ at my table?” He started but then paused. ”Hey wait, don’t I know yer ass? Ya’ look really familiar ‘er somethin’.” Chris shifted more in his seat and pointed his finger. “Are you dat asshole who fuckin’ stole my damn twix bar the other day?! That was fuckin rude. You dun see me doin’ shit like that!” However Chris paused to attempt to think. ”Or did I? I can’t remember now. I did hit that one guy in the jaw, but the bastard deserved it. He did! He deserved all kinds ‘a things. Give ‘em an academy award already.” Chris slapped the table. ”Leo already did a bunch’a shit man. Why you gotta be hating on his actin’ all the time, even if he looks like a lil’ ole grandma but a dude. Granddude Leo. Fuck ‘em.”

[Selina Taylor]

    Selina sat at her usual table in Tink’s Bar and had been dancing and/or chatting with the women at the bar on and off all night, so she was a bit tipsy. She wasn’t smashed… mostly. Selina took another shot of tequila and cast an amused glance at a man who’d made his way inside. He was clearly far drunker than she, as he didn’t even seem to realize the fact that he was in a lesbian bar. Not that there weren’t other men in the bar… but they tended to be a bit more flamboyant in style and manner. Selina grinned wickedly as her friend at the bar turned the man down for another drink.

    She could understand why. Luckily he didn’t make too much of an ass of himself about the issue. When he started making his way towards her, she watched in silent, mild interest. She didn’t say a word as he sat down at her table, as she was interested in seeing exactly what he would do. When he claimed the table was his, she couldn’t help the low snicker that escaped her. As the handsome man accused her of stealing his candy, she merely raised an unimpressed brow. If he wanted to start a fight… she wasn’t against showing him his proper place.

    As his rambling continued Selina chuckled once again, “I know right? The poor guy has tried so hard. Besides, he’s blond and white too, what more could they want?” she added with a harsh laugh. Selina then eyed him and smirked, “He’s almost as handsome as you are too,” she offered with a playful wink. She wasn’t looking for someone to take home tonight, particularly not someone as drunk as this man clearly was, but if she ended up with his number for another time, she certainly wouldn’t object either.

[Chris Grayson]

“I know right? The poor guy has tried so hard. Besides, he’s blond and white too, what more could they want?”

Chris frowned as he thought about what Selina had pointed out. He scratched his chin and stared at the table for a few seconds.

”They probably want ‘em to do somethin’ really weird. Like dye himself purple ‘er somethin’. Hollywood’s an asshat.” Chris Stated firmly, nodding his head with a frown. ”The assiest asshat. It ain’t even a hat, it’s a wood. All kinda shit lives in there. Like the big bad wolf. he;s got like,” Chris waved his hand around, ”Some real bad breathin' issues or somethin’.”

Chris definitely couldn’t remember in his current state. Not that it mattered as he looked up at Selina when she spoke.

“He’s almost as handsome as you are too.”

Chris stared for a moment before he began snickering and waved him hand dismissively at Selina.

”Nah, nah. I ain’t all ‘andsome n’ shit. Dat’s for those whaddayacalls.” He tapped his chin and thought for a moment. ”Those picture people. They all stuck in the magazines. Sometimes they only in underwear.” Chris made a face to show his distain for it. ”I dun wanna see dat. It’s nasty. Clothin’ looks better. Like yours.” He motioned with his had and gave Selina a goofy-and-certainly-drunk smile. ”Yours looks good. I dun understand all dat fashion shit.”