Jolly Old Buddies

[Riley Forrester]

Chris.

Chris.

CHRIS.

ANSWER YA DAMN PHONE

[Chris Grayson]

Did you not stop and think that maybe I was busy? That maybe I actually had important shit to do today other than sit around and entertain your ass? Hmm?

[Riley Forrester]

Well then

Do you?

[Chris Grayson]

No. So what's up music meister?

[Riley Forrester]

I'm bored.

I wanna go do something

We should go do something

You must entertain your music meister

[Chris Grayson]

So glad to know I'm your goddamn go to when you've got no one else to bother the hell out of. Ok Einstein, what's the plan?

[Riley Forrester]

I have no idea

And of course you're my go to

Because you love it so much

But yeah we should meet up or something like that

[Chris Grayson]

I love it about as much as I love cheese-grating my hand. Where are we meeting up? This better not be some scam to get me on some journey to "better myself" or some shit.

[Riley Forrester]

Chris.

You're an asshole

You'll always be an asshole

The day you start acting nice is the day the world ends

Besides I don't know if I could handle a cuddly and kind Chris

It would be nightmare fuel

As for meeting up we could go eat or something

[Chris Grayson]

Damn straight I'm an asshole. But I'm an awesome asshole. Enough that the world would end if I crossed over to the nice side. Besides a cute and cuddly Chris would be boring as hell. Also why do we always have to go eat to hang out? Screw that let's go to a club. Clubs are a hell of a lot more fun.

[Riley Forrester]

You're an asshole, period

Yeah maybe you're right

Hey well excuuuuuuuse me princess

Sorry I like eating

But sure lets do a club

We can go to the lesbian one

For science

[Chris Grayson]

I'm not just a princess; I'm the most badass princess. Get it right. And if by "science" you mean your "delve into the female anatomy while I sit like a complete shit on the sidelines," then no. If we're going to a club we're making damn sure we can both have fun, lovely as watching girls dance together is. We're going to the Pulse.

[Riley Forrester]

Oh so sorry

Excuuuuuuuuussseeee me badass princess

You damn diva

I'm not delving into anything

Besides you're a shit anyways so why would it matter ifI I were on the sidelines?

And dancing girls are lovely, yes

Fine, Pulse it is

When can you get here?

[Chris Grayson]

*Badass diva. Jesus Riley, come on now. I'm sure you'll be delving into pants in no time. Or someone'll try delving into yours. And even though I'm shit, I'm not the kind of shit that sits. I do stuff and spread it. I'll be at the Pulse in twenty minutes. Don't be late, even if it's "fashionable."

[Riley Forrester]

You can't just add badass to everything

And I'm really not looking for pants delving

Mine or otherwise

Oh I get it

You're high quality shit

So sorry shitlord

Twenty minutes? Alright

You sure you don't need more to get pretty?