Uncertain Meetings

[Ashley Benson]

Ashley really did enjoy her schedule.  It may not have suited everyone but it did her on levels most couldn't understand.  As a staple of dealing with her condition, Ashley was forced into a life built around a strict routine.  Since she'd moved out of the Academy and the amount of responsibility in her day to day life increased, Ashley had began to flourish.  Every morning she awoke and slipped out of bed to start the coffee maker before jumping into the shower and brushing her teeth before Ellen awoke, freeing the bathroom for Ellen to get ready.  After Ellen got up and trudged her way into the shower, Ashley would make breakfast, usually something light, and had it waiting.  After breakfast she sent Ellen off to work, cleaned up and set about her day.

It was all terribly domestic, yes, but it kept Ashley's mind focused and engaged, something that was crucial managing her condition.  The routine also eased her tension about Ellen paying for nearly everything on her own.  Ashley felt like a contributing member of the home and with her being able to take most of her college courses online now it made sense for her to take on the lion's share of the household chores.  Ellen grumbled and protested here and there, much to Ashley's chagrin, and it had taken a great deal of arguing to convince Ellen that Ashley didn't feel obligated to do it but she actually enjoyed it.  She finally had a purpose, a direction, a set of goals to complete every day.  She was finally beginning to feel like she belonged somewhere in the world and whether or not Ellen could see, she was the sole reason for it.

The knock at the apartment door had come just as Ashley was settling down to play with Mia, her snow white, Maine Coon kitten.  Curiously she turned her eyes up toward the door, brow furrowing.  She glanced down to the kitten who was beginning to get riled up over the feathery end of a cat toy Ashley had bought earlier in the day and slowly got to her feet as she set the toy aside.  Cautiously she crossed through the kitchen and peered through the peephole.  "W-who is it?"  She called, her voice wavering slightly.

[Pan Banks]

A few days after her visit to Ellen's apartment Pan had decided to visit again. It seemed logical to assume that a slow and steady approach would be the best way to win back her sister's favor. Since she had yet to learn much about Ellen's daily activities, house-calls were her primary option. That, and she was also hoping to run into the mysterious second person that shared the apartment with her sister.

Her first visit had uncovered a few photographs, and little tell-tale signs that the apartment wasn't entered. More than that, it had a homely feel that Pan doubted Ellen could have accomplished.
Her investigation was more than just idle curiosity. She had to know what kind of person could, and was living with her baby sister. It both surprised and made Pan ridiculously happy, even though she had no idea how it had occurred. Clearly Ellen didn't let people in easily, which made it all the more important to meet this person the first chance she got. Though Ellen was very unhelpful with that.

Pan rapped on the door, straightening sharply to attention as she heard someone approach. She folded her hands calmly and donned her most winning smile, aiming it at the peephole where she was sure someone was watching. Since the voice wasn't cursing it seemed easy to assume she'd discovered the mysterious roommate. Quickly she did a little fist-pump of joy, hopefully out of the peepholes view. "Uh, good morning! My name is Pan Banks, I'm Ellen's big sister. Is she not home?" How refreshing it felt to say that without Ellen around to rebuke her.

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[Ashley Benson]

"Ellen's not here." Ashley blurted out before really giving the person on the other side of the door much of a chance to speak. Quickly Ashley realized how rude she sounded and issued a a hasty "Sorry!" Before pushing away from the door and pinching the bridge of her nose. She was making this a lot more difficult than it needed to be. She wasn't a paranoid, frightened girl anymore.

Then there were words that drifted through the door that snapped Ashley out of her own mind. With a quick, almost practices grace the chain and deadbolt locking the door were released and it opened. Deep, azure eyes peeled curiously around the slowly opening door. "D-did you say Ellen's sister?"

[Pan Banks]

The fact that Ellen wasn't there wasn't really a big issue, considering it still left her with the ability to get to know this other girl. And it was a girl, she now knew. Whether that meant her earlier suspicions about Ellen dating her roommate or not, she was unsure, and it didn't really matter. It was exciting nonetheless.

For a time it seemed like the girl on the other side of the door had run away from her, so when the door suddenly swung open she squeaked in surprise. "Wow! You have gorgeous eyes," the stated blurted out enthusiastically to compensate for the shock. Grinning now, Pan nodded her head. "Pan....Err, Victoria Banks. I visited Ellen a few days ago, I didn't realize she wouldn't be home." Either that or she was hiding in her closest or something.

She was already positive the girl hiding behind the door lived with Ellen, but she also needed a way to start a conversation, and maybe even be allowed inside again to await Ellen's return. "Did I catch you in the middle of breaking into this apartment or something? I didn't know Ellen had a room-mate."

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[Ashley Benson]

Ashley almost flinched at the comment about her eyes, drawing back and almost truly hiding behind the door before Pan's words fully sunk in. She paused, her brow furrowing for a moment and then a sheepish smile slowly spread across her face. It was obvious the young woman wasn't used to compliments, at least not vocalized ones. Ashley was told everything she needed to know by the way Ellen looked at her during the quiet, more intimate moments shared between the two but to hear the words, as innocent and minor as they may seem remained strange and almost alien to her. "Oh. Um. Thank you." She said, now stepping out from behind the door.

There was no mistaking Ashley for someone who was, at least comfortable within the apartment. An oversize t-shirt that hung just above the bottom of a pair of shorts coupled with bare feet made for poor breaking and entering attire. Again Ashley's brow furrowed in confusion. "I-I'm sorry?" She said, watching Pan curiously. It then dawned on her what was going on and she instantly seemed to relax, the smile returning to her face. "Oh, no. We're roommates, yes." Ashley confirmed with a nod. "We met at Bellefonte and I guess we sort of hit it off." She gave a light chuckle. "I can't say for sure what it was, you know Ellen, if she doesn't hate you from the moment she sees you you're doing something right." Ashley stepped back away from the door and gestured for Pan to enter. "Please, come in." She said quietly before continuing. "I needed to get off campus, I'm still a junior, and Ellen offered to let me stay with her." It was all such a simple, easy to believe story. It was almost a wonder why every word that passed through Ashley's lips felt hollow and dry in spite of her light, almost pleasant delivery.

[Pan Banks]

The fact that the girl had practically hidden again just because of Pan's compliment only made her want to do it more and more often. Compliments were never a bad thing in her book, and giving them was definitely never a burden for the cheery woman. Making others feel special or smile, particularly those like Ellen's 'friend' who seemed to receive it so rarely, was the most fun for her.

A slow smile appeared on Pan's face as she took in the explanation. She could quite easily believe she was Ellen's room-mate, considering her casual attire. Maybe it was only her scheming mind that made her want to see more, to assume more. But she was far from ready to give up hope yet. "I agree," she laughed readily, an almost musical sound just by itself. "You must have some kind of magic. There are those that Ellen tolerates, and then there are those that live with her." There was unmistakable warmth in her voice as Pan answered, stepping inside the apartment. "There aren't many people who are able to wholly accept her. I feel like I need to thank you, but it's far from my place at this point, and doing so would only be disrespectful for the both of you."

She already knew her way around because of her previous visit, but she loitered just past the entrance, not wanting to appear rude by wandering around the place. "I see....And Ellen extended this offer to all the juniors, did she? How were you chosen? Fight to the death?" Years of influencing the emotions of others had also attuned Pan to reading them in others. Her story, whether true or not, had lacked the same heart that the rest of their conversation had thus far shown. It was as if the beautiful cake that was Ash had suddenly become a dry cracker within a single sentence, and Pan wasn't buying it.

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[Ashley Benson]

Ashley was only certain of one thing at this point in the brief conversation with the mysterious young woman who claimed to be Ellen's sister. Pan certainly seemed to know Ellen well enough to warrant some consideration to the proclamation of family. Ashley nodded faintly, almost getting lost in what her own response would be before the words ever touched her lips. With a furrowed brow she shook her head and went to speak before her voice caught in her throat. The story of being merely roommates with Ellen usually placated the questions of those around them but Pan was different. It was evident Ellen wasn't nearly as much of a mystery to Pan as she was to so many others.

"Please. Come in. You can sit, if you'd like." Ashley said as she postponed responding to Pan's inquiry with a polite, soft spoken invitation. She hurried through the kitchen to the living room and scooped up the tiny, white, poofy kitten that had been lazily plodding around on the carpet. She drew the animal in, clutching it almost protectively to her chest as if the kitten would, in some way, deflect Pan's questions. "She's not like that." Ashley said, shifting her weight from foot to foot uncomfortably. Pan wasn't wrong in the slightest when it came to her assessment of Ellen, Ashley simply didn't like to hear it. "We met because of a horse." Ashley finally admitted with a faint smile. She still couldn't quite bring herself to keep eye contact with Pan and used the kitten in her arms as an excuse to glance down every once in a while. "Neptune took a liking to me so I guess Ellen did too. From then on we became friends." She gave a short shrug of her shoulders. "I can't explain why, it just happened."

Ashley should have left it at that. She should have kept her mouth shut but there as something about the way Pan looked at her. Something about the curiosity in the blonde woman's eyes that made Ashley believe her story wasn't being wholly accepted. Pan knew too much already. Ellen wasn't the type to simply 'make friends'. There was far more to it and Ashley could tell immediately Pan was well aware of this. She issued a resigned sigh as her shoulders slumped. Piercing blue eyes lifted from the white kitten and focused upon Pan.

"You're not believing any of that, are you?" Ashley asked even though she already knew the answer.

[Pan Banks]

"Thanks." She accepted the offer gratefully, draping herself onto the same chair Ellen had pointed her towards on her earlier visit. Now that she had a resident's blessing she clearly made herself at home, leaning back on the legs of the chair and watching Ash curiously. The adorable kitten in her arms seemed to be a shield more than a pet, and Pan had to wonder just how uncomfortable she'd already made Ellen's friend.

Placing her hands in her lap, Pan attempted to look less dangerous. "Have you decided whether or not I'm going to eat you yet? A conversation might be easier if you came a little closer, or at least gave me a few pointers to help make you feel a little more comfortable. This is your house after all." She'd wanted to be able to befriend Ellen's roommate, or at least get to know her. Chances were, if she managed that much it would possibly make Ellen more receptive to her return as well. She hadn't expected Ash to be so timid, though now that she thought about it, it made perfect sense. Clearly she wasn't entirely spineless; she had fire when it came to Ellen. At least a little bit. Hearing Ash's defiance made her grin. "I'm glad she has someone like you to say that."

Her interest peaked and Pan leaned forward as Ash mentioned a horse. They hadn't been allowed pets growing up, and Pan hadn't had any idea Ellen had wanted one. Of course as soon as she'd had the opportunity she'd gone and gotten herself a pet, so it wasn't surprising Ellen had sought some of the same comfort. Though clearly she'd found something a little better along the way. "How long have you been friends then? "

Pan giggled as Ashley gave up on her act. She shook her head, dyed red hair flaring like flames. Ellen had nearly had a fit when she'd seen what her sister had done to her trademark 'Banks Blonde' hair. "I believe you're not sharing everything, and that's ok. You did just welcome a stranger into your house after all, I don't need to pry all your secrets out." Then she winked. "Yet."
Standing up, she ventured a few steps towards Ashley and stopped, leaning over to look at the kitten without invading Ash's clearly defined personal space. She crooned softly, captivated by the cute feline. "She is simply adorable. They're great companions, aren't they? Hercules is always there for me when I'm lonely, or scared."

She didn't need to know everything about Ellen and Ashley, or even if there was an 'Ellen and Ashley' to find out about. For the time being she was happy to learn more about her sister's roommate, and she'd found that pets or other shared hobbies were typically the best way to go about it. And the best part was, she didn't even have to lie about how cute the white kitten was. Honesty was the best policy.

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[Ashley Benson]

Ashley's lips parted to reply but now words escaped. Pan made sense and it occurred to the dark haired young woman how foolish she looked. Twenty-two years old and standing in the middle of her own home, nearly cowering in fear at a stranger's presence. If only that remained the only factor to Ashley's apparent nerves. Ellen was secretive and had been adamant on keeping the true nature of their relationship between the two of them. Ashley hadn't given it much thought through the years as she rarely came in contact with anyone who would question her role in Ellen's life. Still she couldn't shake the almost farcical way in which she'd been acting. "I-I'm sorry." She replied after a long moment. "I don't mean to be rude. I don't entertain guests often." She offered Pan a smile that while still framed by Ashley's nervousness was warm and genuine. Even if she didn't opt to draw closer to Pan just yet. "I guess I'm a little surprised." She admitted sheepishly. "Ellen never mentioned you before."

"Four years." Ashley almost blurted the answer out in her awkward overcompensation to her previous apprehension. Her eyes remained locked upon the young woman nearly mesmerized by the way Pan spoke just as much as the way she moved. When Pan got to her feet and slowly drew closer Ashley watched with an almost rapt fascination. She felt the hair on the back of her neck stand on end and a warm chill ran along her spine. Pan's talk of sharing secrets was met with silence though Ashley readily jumped on the discussion of animals. She nodded, her eyes dropping briefly to take in the sight of the kitten who was now bundled up and snoozing lazily in her arms. "Mia's my best friend, next to Ellen." Ashley said with a soft chuckle.

In a flash the smile faded. Ashley's features didn't grow somber or worried so much as contemplative. Even as the attention of the conversation had shifted to animal companions, something safe and easy Ashley could talk about, her mind refused to follow suit. Instead the weight of Pan's words flitted about, interfering with her thoughts. Ashley wasn't sharing anything. She never did. She'd never once discussed her relationship with Ellen and what it meant. Not a single word had ever passed by her lips that indicated she was anything other than unlikely friends. Suddenly Ashley broke the silence. Her voice came out clear and certain, a drastic contrast to how she'd addressed Pan earlier. She hadn't meant to say it. The words tumbled from her lips seemingly of their own volition. She didn't regret it, though. In fact, the words felt good to finally say even if Pan was still very much a stranger.

"I'm in love with her."

[Pan Banks]

She accepted Ash's reasoning with a forgiving nod, waving her hand to imply the situation was dealt with and passed. Besides, if she had it her way she would be a friend some day, instead of a guest. She'd appeared at the apartment in order to get close to Ellen's 'friend' in order to inadvertently get closer to Ellen. That idea was still there of course, and she refused to feel bad for trying to get closer to her sister, but now it wasn't just using Ash that was on her mind. The girl was interesting and shy, and Pan found herself drawn to her and the prospect of friendship.

"No, I'm not surprised at that," Pan answered with a small wince. She pinched the bridge of her nose, guiltily licking her lips. "I only returned to Kalispell recently, I hadn't actually contacted her for a long time. Much longer than I should have." The same regret that she hadn't been able to escape for months now surged through her, leaving a bitter taste in her mouth. "She kind of....You know, hates me. I'm trying to fix that, if I can." Her expression was desperate when she lifted her gaze, trying to convey just how much she was hurting to the sensitive girl.

Her expression cleared a little and Pan raised an eyebrow in surprise. Four years was an awfully long time, but even more than that, Ashley had seemed rather desperate to blurt out the information. Was there something behind those four years that she wasn't sharing? Almost definitely; but she'd already decided not to pry. Not yet. It seemed much safer to focus on the adorable cat instead. "Miiiiia" She repeated, drawing out the name lovingly. "My Hercules would love you. Perhaps they could meet sometime? It would be great for him to have a friend." She had more than one motive of course, as was common for her. It seemed like it would also be a good way for her and Ash to become closer, and not only that, maybe being around Pan's loud personality would draw out a little more confidence in Ash.

She glanced at Ashley for askance, holding her knuckles out to see if Mia would want to investigate her scent.
The change in Ash was obvious instantly, and Pan straightened instinctively to look her in the eye. Rather than the cowering girl, this was a woman that was meeting her eye now. Her eyes widened in shock. She'd more or less guessed they were banging, but love? That wasn't anything she'd expected. At first Pan tried to hide the giant smile trying to spread across her face, but in the end she gave up and beamed. "I'm happy for you both." There was no guarantee that Ellen had the same feelings, but considering she was letting Ash live with her, it seemed stupid to assume otherwise. Automatically Pan stepped forward for a big hug, but remembering how skittish Ashley had seemed she cleared her throat and held out her hand instead to clasp Ash's.
"If you're important to Ellen, you're important to me," she explained, voice intense and serious. "Even more than that, if you truly love my sister, then I only have one thing to say to you." She smiled again, wishing she could hug Ashley tightly. "Welcome to the family. No matter what happens between you and ELlen, or between Ellen and myself; if you ever need anything, you just call and I'll come running."

Despite what she'd done ten years ago, Pan wasn't typically one to put herself before her family. Loyalty meant a lot to her, and she didn't believe family was necessarily tied to blood. She planned to be the family to Ellen that their father had never been. More importantly, she wanted to be able to give anyone a family, and if Ellen had finally found someone she truly cared about, Pan was more than happy to adopt them as her own.

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[Ashley Benson]

There was no keeping the frown from twisting Ashley's features as Pan spoke of the relationship she shared with Ellen. Ashley knew Ellen could be an unforgiving person but it still tugged at her heartstrings to think she had an estranged sister to go along with the brother she rarely acknowledged. Ashley's head shook, though she had no words. She didn't know what transpired all those years ago when Pan left nor had Ellen even mentioned that Pan had returned with hopes of finding her way back into Ellen's life. It seemed as though there was much going on Ellen hadn't bothered to fill Ashley in on.

Ashley visibly tensed when Pan moved closer, going so far as to actually wince from the embarrassment of the instinct as arm slid around her. With unsteady hands, Ashley returned the hug, taking a moment to bask in the sudden, yet not unwelcome gesture. By the time Pan had finished talking and Ashley pulled away a tear had fallen, tracing a trail down her cheek that glinted in the overhead light. There was no fear or sadness to be found in Ashley's face, though, as she reached up to wipe the errant tear away. "I don't know what to say." She admitted, her voice soft. Pan's words alone, even though they came from a stranger were more than enough to bring about a surge of emotion the likes of which Ashley had never experienced. Just the mere thought of being part of something, part of a family was nearly overwhelming. "Thank you." She added simply for lack of anything else to say. Ten minutes with Ellen's sister and Ashley had already been rendered speechless.

[Pan Banks]

Pan grimaced at Ash's apparent displeasure concerning her relationship with Ellen. She felt a flicker of worry. Would Ash support Pan's attempt to work her way back into Ellen's life? She wouldn't be surprised if Ash's love of her sister would manifest in a desire to keep away people that Ellen hated. Though considering the list of people Ellen hated was as high as the Eiffel tower and twice as wide, the idea was rather unrealistic.
Still, going against the gentle Ash was a real concern. It wouldn't damage her confidence of course, but definitely her passion.

Even though Ash accepted her contact - which Pan was both surprised and thrilled by - she released the timid girl quickly. Baby steps after all. She'd already gained more than she'd expected, and probably crossed a hundred different boundaries to do so. There was no sense pressuring the poor girl.

She beamed at Ashley as she wiped away her tears, moved herself by the emotional display. Ellen was still probably going to kill her for this, but even knowing that, nothing could ruin the pride and warmth she was feeling at that moment. "You don't need to thank me," she replied earnestly. Having Ash accept her was more than enough thanks for her words. "I know it's a lot to ask, circumstances being what they are, but would you mind hearing me out? I'd like to plead my case to you, as if were." She hesitated, worrying her fingers absently. "You're probably the closest person to Ellen right now, so maybe if you support me trying to repair our relationship, it might help get through to her. You feel me?"

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[Ashley Benson]

Ashley nodded, sniffing a little and wiping away a bit of the tears that lingered in the corner of her eye. The surge of emotion, while positive had disoriented her. She passed by Pan, nodding as the other girl spoke. "You don't have to ask." She said, casting a smile over her shoulder as she crossed into the living room and went to settle into the couch, Mia still bundled into her arms. "Come in." She urged, waving Pan in further. "Sit. Ellen can complain all she wants, you're welcome here."

There was something in Pan's voice that seemed to have captured and held Ashley's attention. Even as she relocated into the couch she couldn't help but cast short glances up as Ellen's sister spoke. The Banks family had far more secrets and skeletons in their closet than Ashley had ever anticipated and Pan was merely adding to them. Slowly Ashley nodded. "Okay." She said without hesitation. She didn't pretend to know what was best for Ellen but she couldn't bear to see family pushed away without attempting to reconcile whatever it was that had split the sisters. "I'm not going to lie or do anything that would hurt her." She cautioned. "But I think Ellen needs her family more than she realizes."