Restless Sleep? (Jerk Riley)

[Hadley Roarke]

One whole week had passed since her blow out with Riley. Quite honestly? Every day sucked. But she was not about to let him know that. She avoided him like the plague. It made it easier for him to pretend she didn't exist, she thought, and it made it easier for her to 'get over him.' That was their agreement. And she absolutely sucked at it. The fight made her think about him even more. Could she have said something that might have made a difference? Probably not. He was so hard headed.

The room was dark and quiet; beautiful sleep could be had here. Hadley, the little rebel, did not cave in to sleeps deep desire. Instead, she pushed her sheets off and sat up. Her breathing sounded so loud, and she could hear her heart beat slowly. Why could she not just go to sleep, and pretend to wake up happy? Her era of happiness here came to a screeching halt, because of him. She glared in his direction of the dorm room.

As soon she she glared, her expression softened to sadness. He made her so mushy. She hated it. Riley affected her so much, why? It should be easy to get over a guy that says he doesn't want you, right? What kind of moron would stick around? A masochistic one. Like life hadn't beat her to a bloody pulp already. She groaned softly and flopped back, promptly hitting her head on the wall. Somewhere, somehow, she deserved that.

Her biggest question for Riley was why he insisted upon not being the nice guy. It's like he enjoyed hurting others. Why? Hadley was mean as hell, but she didn't go out of her way to prove that she was cold. It just happened naturally. But that's not who he was. He liked to think so, though. Hadley sighed and got off her bed. No sense is wondering when he was right across the hall. When she opened her door, it squeaked from the rust. She moved softly towards his side of the hall. God this was going to be awkward. Had knocked as softly as she could while making sure he could hear it. He was probably asleep.. This was just another reason for him to hate her. It's just that she needed answers dammit.

[Riley Coleson]

An entire week had passed and Riley was still as confused about himself and what had happened as he had been during the fight. He still didn't know just what to make of it, or what to tell himself. Did he do the right thing? Probably not. Did he regret it? Sort of. Did he still view himself as a coward? Definetly. But yet, here he was, hiding out in his room. He always made sure Hadley was out of sight before leaving or entering, how pathetic wasn't that?

And like that wasn't enough, he had trouble sleeping. The thought of her being right there was nagging the back of his head and it left him twisting and turning in his bed. This was a pain in the ass. He needed his sleep to get his training done - and his school work. He didn't have enough energy to pull all his weight if he didn't manage to get some sleep soon.

Things wasn't supposed to go down like that, because he really did enjoy hanging out with her. He did enjoy messing around and teasing her, like they had did before this entire thing had gotten out of hand. Ugh, what a mess...

And even better yet, his mind had been completely occupied so he hadn't even managed to get laid. Bet she was happy about that one, huh. She had completely fucked with his head and here he was, sexually frustrated and sleepy. Great. Just great.

Then someone knocked on the door and his entire body tensed up. He remained silent for a few seconds before finally forcing himself to crawl out of the bed, ''One second,'' he muttered with a groggy voice and dragged himself over towards the door, not even bothering to get dressed. Whoever it was, it was probably someone who had seen him half naked before. It wasn't like Hadley would show up in the middle of the night or anything, right? Exactly. She was pissed at him.

With a yawn, Riley opened the door and looked downwards. His eyes widened as he saw who was standing outside and his jaw dropped, ''Uh...'', he muttered and rubbed his eyes, ''Hiya,'' he then whispered a little awkwardly, suddenly very aware over the fact that he was half-naked, and it was surprisingly enough incredible awkward for him. But damn, even at this hour she looked fucking hot. How was that even possible?

[Hadley Roarke]

The nervous feeling she got with him started eating at her stomach, while she was waiting for him to open the door. And when he did open it, it took all she could not to tackle him and make his wish of her legs around his waist come true. She bit her lip and looked him up and down with a small smile. He was either very cocky, or was sleeping and not thinking about clothes. It didn't matter. Her night was made. Only when she saw his well sculpted chest did it hit her that her attire was not completely appropriate: a tight navy blue t-shirt and a pair of her favorite lacy, black underwear. Now it felt even more uncomfortable. By uncomfortable she meant awkward as hell.

Had ran a hand through her curled, blonde locks. Her voice stayed soft, as not to disturb the quiet, throughout her whole speech. "I just had a question, um-" She bit her lip again and took a deep breath. "After this, I'll leave you alone, I swear it. Why do you insist on telling me you aren't the guy I thought you were? You can be so sweet." She paused her, her eyes resting on his gorgeous brown ones, "But then you act like it didn't even happen. Like kissing my forehead. I'm just confused."

Way to be obvious that you've been thinking about him, Hads. Smooth. Stupid Riley and his hot body, and 'bad boy' charm. He made her life so much harder. She kept her gaze with him. If she looked any where else, she might not be able to control herself. Regrets were not a fun thing. She would hate to regret finally having sex with him.

Answers were needed, fast, or she might give in to the temptation.

[Riley Coleson]

Well, if Hadley thought what she was weren't wasn't hot, she was wrong. Very wrong. Especially since Riley was already sexually frustrated as it was and then she showed up looking like that? Well, damn. If he kept staring, he was a lost cause for sure. So, instead he forced his eyes up to hers, putting himself in place. Constantly forcing his eyes to not wander and take all of... That in. God, this was going to be hard. Like, really hard.

Her questions had him sighing as he leaned against the doorway, gesturing for her to enter as he rubbed his eyes again. She wasn't going to drop it, he knew that. So it was better to talk inside rather than making her stand out here like this, right? Right. Okay, he could do this. Half naked girl in his room, no problem. Nope. ''You should come inside,'' he said and turned his back against her to walk in, immediately starting a search for something to wear. He remained silent as he settled for a white tank top and a gray pair of sweatpants. He sat down at the edge of the bed as he pulled the pants on, ''You choose hell of a timing for these kind of questions, dont'cha?'', he chuckled and shook his head.

Once his pants were on, he leaned his forward against the back of his hand and yawned, the white tank top dangling from his free hand, ''I insist on it because I'm not a good guy, Hadley,'' he said softly and looked back up at her, ''You know what I'm like,'' Hadn't she seen him in action? She had been there in the cafeteria, right? And she was still doubting whether or not he was a asshole? Sheesh. She really hated giving up, didn't she?

''You shouldn't let a few seconds of sweetness throw you off from someone's real personality, babe,'' he said again and leaned his elbows against his thighs, his expression serious.

[Hadley Roarke]

Hadley walked through the threshold and into his room. Was she asleep? She was with Riley, and they weren't yelling; yeah, she must be asleep. He started putting clothes on and she frowned. "Damn," she muttered with a sigh. His chuckle made her smile and she gave a shrug. "When I want something I go for it. I just couldn't sleep, so I wanted to ask you that. Now would be as good of a time as any. I didn't want people seeing us talking, for your sake." Her words were still soft and she whispered the last sentence. This was heart breaking. The Jerk.

After his little speech, she remained quiet for a few minutes. Lies and bullshit. He was full of it. People had a tendency to be rude to Had, so when someone went out of their way to be nice she remembered. Especially a guy that made her feel like she was on cloud nine. Every time he would look up at her she would bite her lip. He was a sleepy mess. Just adorable, really. If he was so sleepy, she should just crawl into bed with him and cuddle. She closed her eyes at the thought. Being that close to him again? She would give anything for it.

"I call bullshit, and you know it, Riley." Had sat on his bed, up where the pillows were, with her back against the wall. Might as well get comfortable. She wanted to drag this out. Even if all they did was this, she wanted to be near him. Poor, Hadley. She had it hard.

"Oh, James does have a girlfriend apparently." A subject change was good. James was a topic that always made her feel better. Maybe this would defer some of the awkwardness in the air. "Lily," Had gave a small laugh. "'Her hair is like sunlight!' Quoted from the kid himself. He knows how to woo a girl after all, just like you." A grin danced on to her lips and she brought her knees to her chest. She rested her chin on her knees. Her eyes never left his body. "You know, it made no sense to put on clothes. I'd already seen your gorgeous body," she teased. This was all she wanted, to make him smile. He had avoided her just like she avoided him. A week was a long time without seeing that boy's handsome smile.

[Riley Coleson]

Riley looked at her with a sad smile and sighed, ''I'm not embarrassed to be seen with you,'' he said and leaned further back in the bed, propping himself up on his elbows, very aware of how good his upper body looked in the dim light. After all, not putting on a tank top had been on purpose. However, he did not know why. After all, his looks and his body was the only thing he had to offer and he did the most of it. As often as he could.

He looked at her again as she sat down and once more, he shook his head. She thought he was lying, but in fact, he was being quite honest, even if it might have sounded weird coming from him, ''Believe what you want,'' he shrugged, the sad smile returning to his lips. He looked away before sighing and covered his face with his hands. Why id she even bother? ''Look, Hadsie, it's not that I don't find you attractive or that I don't lik- I'm just not a relationship kind of guy, okay? I'm no Superman. I can't change overnight,'' That was impossible for anyone.

Watching her as she talked about her brother was surpisngly calming. It made him think of her own ibling, Kalilah. She was his princess and there was nothing he wouldn't do for her to make sure she was all right. Hadley had similar feelings he could relate to, which was probably why he found it so easy to talk about his sister to her. ''Oh yeah? That's nice,'' he said and sMiled, a low chuckle escaping his lips. Riley sat back up again and hoisted himself towards her, leaning against the same wall she sat against.

He remained silent for a few seconds before leaning his ad against her side, peeking up at her with a serious expression, ''I'm sorry for being such a idiot. Please forgive me, babe,'' he whispered.

[Hadley Roarke]

At least he wasn't ashamed of her. She was too gorgeous to be embarrassed by. Ah, Superman? No, he wasn't. Superman probably didn't treat Louis Lane like that. He saved her. And, although Riley did not know it, Riley had saved her. When they first became friends, she was so at peace and happy. He was a hunky guy. Him teasing her so much made her feel great. Every woman needs a man that does not just tell her she looks great, but makes her feel like she's extremely beautiful. And Riley hit the nail on the head.

When he moved towards her she closed her eyes. 'No, no, no. Please don't. His words surprised her, and she opened her eyes to see his adorable expression. Forgive him? Not without making him pay. She would work on that. Revenge was a dish best served by Hadley. Damn, she needed to copyright that. Yeah, he was in idiot. He was also a man, too. They tended to be idiots more often than not.

Hadley positioned herself so she was straddling him, just like that day on the couch. Her hands went over every curve and dent in his chest. What was she doing? 'Come on, Had. Get off of him.' She looked up at him and bit her lip. Her hands moved his to her hips, then she moved hers to his face. Oh, those eyes. She ran her thumb over his lips before kissing them softly. 'Damn you, Hadley. What if he doesn't change?' The thoughts in her head were conflicting. She thought about how miserable she was away from him. The only logical thing to do was see if she could change his mind, then just be friends. Because she had to do something. Had regretted not sleeping with him more than she regretted not hitting him that night.

Her blonde hair fell over her face. Hadley pulled away and sighed. "Please, tell me if you want me to stop," her words were a whisper. She was going to give in to temptation and see where that took her. Nothing else to lose, right? Her fingers found the hem of her shirt, and she lifted it above, and off of her tiny frame. She tried to look as innocent as possible, as if that might persuade him. In her mind she was celebrating her leap forward. This was the girl she knew and loved; this girl took chances and was high strung. That pathetic, sad girl that she was without him? It was done, because tonight they would decide where they stood. No hurt feelings. No lost loves. Just a straight shot, so she could get on with her life. And he could go back to sleeping with whomever he chose.

[Riley Coleson]

Riley couldn't hide the surprise from his face as she straddled his lap and kissed his lips. It idn't help much that she started to undress herself either, and man, the way her hands felt on his body. It clouded his mind, made it hard for him to breathe - to think. It felt so good, and after a an entire week og not getting laid, it was hard for him to deny her sudden change of mind. What on earth was she thinking? Didn't she know she was only playing with fire?

''It's not that I want you to stop, because believe me, I'd be a fool to, but Hadley,'' he began and moved his hand to the back of her neck, running his hand through her hair before resting his forehead ainst , ''I just don't think you're thinking about this,'' After all, it wasn't the first time he had witnessed someone act on a broken heart or insecure feelings. She deserved better. He wanted to give her something better.

Instead, Riley did something so out of character it surprised even himself. He lifted her up only to place her back on he bed, lying her down on her side with her back against his. He wrapped his arm around her waist and kissed the back of her neeck, ''This is enough for me. For now,'' he whsipered and pulled her tighteragianst his body - listening to the sound of her breathing and her heartbeat.

''I do care about you, you know.i don't want to do something you might end up regretting,''

[Hadley Roarke]

He didn't understand; she was over thinking it. Hads had a theory that subconsciously, this was what she came here to do: sleep with him. They had that sexual attraction. That was made obvious last week. God, she was an idiot for turning him down.

His actions surprised her. Now he was turning her down. All he wanted to do was cuddle? She sighed in frustration. "See? There's the Riley I love so much," she whispered as she drew herself as close as possible to him. Great. A rejection. Still, this went better than she expected it to. She figured she would be forced to set his bed on fire. It sort of disappointed her that she wouldn't be able to do that. Now that was playing with fire.

"If you care so much, why are you doing this?" This as in avoiding her, making her depressed. His caring didn't make any sense. It was similar to her dramatic outburst that it took to confess her feelings for him. Two insane people. They were meant to be. There was too much in common there to ignore. In some ways, they were bad for each other; all they would do is throw fuel on to each other's fires. And in the positive light, he made her so happy. It would be a crime not to be his.

Hadley moved so she was laying on her stomach, her head facing his. "I want you to give me a better answer than what you gave me last week. This time not fueled by annoyance and anger." She forced a small laugh and kissed his nose. Her shirt was still on the floor. His body just felt so good against her skin. What were shirts again? Had pushed her hair back to behind her head. Sometimes it was just in the way, for she had to memorize every thing about his body, before he probably kicked her to the curb again. This time for good.

The petite blonde just could not help herself. Still on her side, she faced her whole body towards him, with a small smile. "God, Riley. You have no idea what you do to me. I want you so bad. I'm not sure if I could walk away without regretting not feeling what is was like to be with you." Yeah, she didn't come here with the intentions she thought she had. This was her true purpose. "I doubt I could regret anything I've done with you, love." She pulled out one of his own guns: love. Well, go big or go home (or in this case, go back to her dark, lonely dorm room). Hads rested her elbow against the bed, with one cheek in her palm. She could feel the warmth that radiated from him. Her bare torso was becoming insanely hot pressed against him. For once in her life the room actually felt a little warm.

[Riley Coleson]

The world 'love' had him holding his breath for a split second, but he decided it was only a figure of speech rather than her actually meaning it that way, because if that was the case, he wasn't quite sure how to deal with it. One thing was her liking him, but love? That was too much. It was far better for him to simply ignore it instead of bailing, ''Yeah...,'' he whispered with a sigh and closed his eyes.

''I don't know,'' was all he managed to answer. It was the truth though. He had no clue about what he was doing anymore. In one second he was shamelessly flirting with other girls and in the next here he was, choosing cuddling over sex? What on earth was wrong with him? Was he getting sick? Maybe he was dying, or going insane?

Riley understood why she was pushing it and why she craved answers, but it still made him feel uncomfortable. Hadn't he made it clear already that he wasn't this kind of guy? This was exactly why he had told her to get over him. He might be cute and sweet now, but what about tomorrow? Or the day after? He couldn't promise her anything. There was nothing for her here, he truly believed it. He didn't want to hurt her, and if she kept this up, he would. If she kept pushing his buttons, sooner or later he'd cave in and then what? What happened if he went back to his old ways? Then they'd be right back at it like they had a week ago. It was a disaster waiting to happen, ''My answer is still the same,'' he said silently and closed his eyes, ''I truly believe there's nothing for you here,''

As she started speaking again, Riley opened his eyes and watched her with a sad expression. She made this really hard for him. His body said yes while his brain said no, and at this point he didn't know who would end up winning over the other. When she said things like this it only fueled his want to go that far but... It seemed wrong. It felt as if he was taking advantage of her feelings - and not in a good way either. Man, when did Riley Liam Coleson become such a sapp? It was a mystery, even to him. He kept still as he rolled onto his back and stared up at the ceiling, narrowing his eyes, ''You don't give up easily do, you?'' he said with a faint smile and closed his eyes, exhaling before letting out a grunt.

''You know, my dad left when I was a kid. My mom couldn't really deal with it and ended up on the bottle, bringing home a new guy every night. That's how my sister was born,'' he said with his eyes still on the ceiling, ''I think that's why I'm so reluctant,''

[Hadley Roarke]

Her heart lurched when he said his answer hadn't changed. That wasn't true; his words. Even if he couldn't see it, there was happiness with him. Just being next to him gave her more sanity than she had an hour ago laying in bed. "You keep saying that. Why do I not believe you?" Her voice sounded bleak. Hadley refused to accept that. Was she in denial, or did she really believe he was a sweet guy hiding behind a facade?

"Of course not. I'm Hadley Roarke. If I gave up, I would not be here with you." This was true. Life kicked her more times than she could count. She kissed his nose. He kept closing those adorable eyes. Maybe that was for the best. He could get her to do anything by just batting those eyelashes.

Hads knew that his dad left from one of their past conversations about their little loved ones. But she wasn't aware of his full situation. His fear was understandable. "We are nothing like our parents." That was for damn sure. The last thing in this world Hadley was going to be was her mother. So Hadley was nineteen and still a virgin? Great. At least she didn't pull down her pants for every guy that wanted a little. No way in hell was she going to end up like her mother. "So stop comparing yourself to them."

It was true that people's past affected who they became. Kaylyn pretended like her daughter didn't exist, so Hadley waltzed around in her pretty dresses with her long legs to watch people stare. Kaylyn was so cold to Hadley, so Hads returned the favor and just never grew out of it. But fear of her mother and who she was never crossed her mind. "Don't give them the satisfaction of running your life. You are nothing like him. And you are nothing like her. You. Are. Riley." She smiled and grasped his chin. Her soft lips found his quickly, then settled on his nose again. "You make me so happy, Riley. I just wanted you to know that. I care about you, even when your a dick," at this she grinned and winked. "So even if you push me away, at least give me the pleasure of being with you tonight. Because I still want to be around you, tease you, and be jealous of all your little toys." She tried to make light of her words, but she was bearing her soul here.

"You don't even have to tell me if you want to be with me or not. It's fine. I get it. You're scared. Why do you think I did what I did last week? I wasn't sure what I wanted. But now I'm positive about my decision." The girl pushed him back and laid herself on top of him, her head on his chest. The room stayed quiet, and all she heard was her deep, nervous breathing, and his steady heart beat. "I know you care about me. Just give me this, please? Then I can go back to admiring you from a distance, just like you want me to."

[Riley Coleson]

Once again, Riley fell silent as she spoke. He knew she was right. Of course she was right, and he also knew that it was all excuses because he wouldn't put himself out there because all the heartache didn't really seem worth the trouble. But not only that, Riley did enjoy his carefree life. He didn't really want to change that and be chained down to one person. That just wasn't him. He was still young and had his entire life to do do the whole relationship thing. He was only eighteen years old, and not nearly ready for that kind of commitment.

''I know,'' he said finally with a sigh, ''But me being Riley means being how I am out there, not in here,'' he pointed out before leaving it to rest. She knew this already. He had told her several times. If she didn't want to believe it, that was fine too. He turned his head to look at her, scanning her face for any kind of expression, but all he was was her smile, ''Just as long as you're aware that I make no promises,'' he said silently and looked away again. He was getting tired. Really tired. And he preferred not to fall asleep in the middle of a conversation, because that was rude, even for being him, ''As long as you're aware of that, then yes, you can stay,''

As she placed herself on top of him, Riley slid his arms to her back, caressing the upper parts of it and yawned, giving her a faint nod, ''All right,'' he whispered. It wasn't like he could stop her anyways and quite frankly, he didn't have the energy to fight with the little firecracker. It wasn't really worth it if it ended up like last time.

His eyes were burning, his head felt light and his body was aching for sleep, but still, there was something holding him back from going into slumber. Was it guilt? Maybe. He didn't like stringing Hadley around like this, but she did it willingly, knowing the consequences of it, right? Riley could only hope. And he did hope, really, really hope. He didn't need or want any more drama in his life than what he already got from his mother.

''We should get some sleep. It's already pretty late,'' he said with a smile and ruffled Hadley's hair, ''Good night, babe,'' he said softly.

[Hadley Roarke]

Yeah, yeah. He was a bad ass. She understood that. No promises? Awesome. No worries for her. Hadley didn't want to be tied down to one person either. It meant that she couldn't enjoy everyone else's stares, and she couldn't flirt. Riley would just take all the fun away from her.. Right? Right. No. Wrong. Didn't she just say she wanted to be with him? He just wouldn't have her. That was so depressing.

It was a shame their time couldn't last longer, but she had woke him up, so it was understandable that he sounded so sleepy. A twinge of guilt traveled through her. She had no right to come barging into his room in the wee hours of the morning. It didn't make her look any better to him. Great.

She nodded at his words and sighed with contentment. "Good night, love." Hadley slid to his left side, her arm still around his waist, so she wasn't sprawled on top of him. He might be able to go to sleep, but it was a long night for her. Nothing changed in the hour she was in here. She just embarrassed herself even more by begging him to let them pretend everything was okay. And the sad part, she was okay with him using her. As long as it meant that he was still part of her world.

He managed to somehow get out of their serious talk. Once again, Riley eluded her. Whatever. Tomorrow, she would know if this night did anything for them. If he talked to her, fabulous. If he ignored her, she would move on. That's what she kept telling herself until she fell asleep. It didn't matter now. She was happy at the present time. Did that not count for something?