Idle Hands...

[Addison Sloane]

Addison was about to breathe out a sigh of relief that Isaac actually bought her lie when his next statement caught her unawares. He had looked for her? When her own mother had abandoned her, who she assumed would be a stranger to her had taken time out of his life to search for her?

The tears were starting to come back as she realised she had lied to the one person who cared enough to look for her when she left. She couldn't take back the lie. There was no way Isaac would ever believe her again if she did. But what more could he deserve other than her full honesty?

"I'm sorry." She said under her breath, her throat closing up as tears brimmed her eyes. "I...I can't do this. I'm so sorry Isaac." She gulped and turned around again. "You're better off." Addison said over her shoulder.

[Isaac Monroe]

Something heated and startling erupted within Isaac. A near overwhelming surge of emotions threatened to take hold the moment Addison turned again. He didn't know what the years apart had done to her, or them, for that matter, but the look on her face as the tears began to fall once more broke what tiny, shriveled heart that remained in Isaac's chest. He was uncertain about much of what had transpired in the moments before. He couldn't even begin to process what, if anything, everything would mean in the coming days, weeks or months. The only thing Isaac knew for certain was he couldn't let Addison walk out. Not this time, not so soon after seeing her again.

Calling out Addison's name again, Isaac pushed forward. Breaking out into a slow jog he quickly closed the gap and reached out to take her arm before she could get far away. "What're you doing?" He asked, incredulous. "After this. All these years. I'm better off?" His head shook even as a pained smile touched his features. "You have no idea." He released his hold on her arm and tilted his head in an attempt to catch her gaze. "I missed you, Addie." He said, the words escaping in a soft, hushed tone.

[Addison Sloane]

She left out a soft sob, releasing a tiny unintentional squeak at the end when she felt a strong hand circle around her skinny arms. It took every bit of her not to force Isaac to release her via his blood because as much as she wanted him to let go, she just as much wanted him to hold on forever.

But what she was about to say could possibly mean he could do the exact opposite of the latter, something which would break her even more than anything that had happened to her in the past. She realised just how selfish that train of thought was, especially when this wasn't going to hurt just her. They had grown up in the same situation, they knew rejection, loss and pain on a level most of the students and even the adults could not even begin to comprehend. What would hurt her, would eventually hurt Isaac and that would hurt her even more. It was a vicious cycle that she did not want to start. But she knew she had to. She owed Isaac that much.

She refused to look at him but his words were more than enough to break her heart even more. She bit the inside of her upper lip, trying not to make it even more obvious that she was crying. Not that it was an easy feat, seeing as her tears were now flowing down her cheeks in a steady stream.

"You're-" She started but her voice broke. Clearing her throat, one hand moved up to squeeze her other arm. Addison tried to keep her breathing in check as she forced herself to go through with this. Isaac deserved her truth.

"You're better off because I wasn't taken. I left. You were too much for me. You made me feel things I couldn't even begin to comprehend. And you were going to leave. Because people always leave. And it's better for me to leave before you leave me because then I'd be in control and you won't be able to hurt me. That's why you're better off. You don't...you don't deserve to be left. You don't deserve to be hurt." She whimpered in pain as her chest constricted. She didn't know too much emotions could actually make her physically ill but there she was, trying hard to erase the cloying sting in her chest.

[Isaac Monroe]

Isaac could do little more than stand, dumbfounded, as Addison let loose with a barrage of previously hidden truths. His head tilted to one side as he stared at the girl. Something inside Isaac's head and thrown in the towel. The overwhelming surge of emotions that came with merely laying eyes on Addison again mingled with the uncertainty, doubts, fears and utter chaos that erupted in his would all separately be met with aggression and anger. However, when Isaac stood in the presence of the petite brunette, his mind could do little more than threaten shutting down altogether under the weight of it all.

It took a few moments of Isaac standing, hands hanging at his sides, jaw slightly slack, blankly staring at Addison before finally moving. His head shook quickly and he reached up to press his palm into his eyes. "So you lef-" He sighed, cutting himself off as he tried in vain to piece together the right words to express the hailstorm of emotions that tore through his mind. "Wait, I don't-" Yet another fractured thought tumbled from his lips before being abruptly cut off. "Addie..." His hand dropped again and his clear, yet troubled, blue eyes focused upon the girl. "We were just kids." He said in almost a protest. "How could you just... leave?"

[Addison Sloane]

In a moment of childish weakness, Addison stamped her foot on the ground, a quiet moan sounding from her throat at the pain she was feeling in her chest. She did not like this feeling at all. Especially because she knew she could only feel this way around Isaac. It wasn't fair to him, it really wasn't but Addison wasn't a fair person. She was selfish, especially now that she had everything to lose.

She could see the struggle as Isaac tried to find the words to convey his feelings. She took shallow breaths to try and calm herself. The question he finally asked made perfect sense but Addie had no clue how to answer.

On the one hand, her go to was to answer with spite. She really honestly had no idea how else, but she was so tired of being angry. She wanted to be rid of all the hatred and anger she felt about her childhood. But how does one undo ten years worth of feeling worthless, rejected and unwanted?

"Because I didn't want you to leave me first." She finally answered, exhaustion clear in her voice. One hand swept up to her eyes as she sighed. Soft sobs could be heard as she tried to calm her breathing down. "After being told time and again that my own blood gave me away, I didn't..." she paused and took deep breaths. "I couldn't help but think someone I just met for one year wouldn't do that to me too."

She bit the inside of her upper lip and finally dared to look at Isaac. "I don't want to give anyone the chance to hurt me like that."

[Isaac Monroe]

Isaac brought a hand up and pinched the bridge of his nose. It was all becoming too much for him. He could feel the frustration begin to boil up inside. They had been so young when Addison chose to leave though her reasons for doing so were decidedly adult in nature. It didn't make sense. "Addie." He tried again, dropping his hand and moving forward to close the gap between himself and the sobbing girl. "We were fourteen." He insisted, reaching out to place both hands on her shoulders. "How could I ever make a decision like that?"

With a huff he pulled back again, head shaking as he still tried to come to grips with everything being said. In the end what happened all those years ago shouldn't have mattered. He should have let it go well before he'd ever gotten to the Academy. The emotions and feelings of a fourteen year old boy who was lost and alone certainly shouldn't carry on until he was now approaching his 20th birthday. "What now?" He asked, turning his eyes back to Addison. "Are you here for good?"

[Addison Sloane]

There was an overwhelming urge to grab Isaac's shirt and pull him to her but the moment he moved forward, Addison instinctively moved backwards. She didn't have to it seems, since Isaac had pulled back. "She gave me up when she was fifteen." Addison pressed the heel of her palm against her brow bone, her breathing not getting any better.

His question brought an unexpected sob before Addison wiped her face with both her hands and nodded quietly. After a while, she dropped her hands and looked up at Isaac. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I left." She took in a shuddering breath before continuing. "I couldn't deal with...there was a part of me that would have done and went whatever and wherever you asked me to go and that scared the shit out of me.

"You were right. We were fourteen. Which was why I was scared and I thought dealing with it on my own was better than thinking...or knowing that you would leave at any second."

[Isaac Monroe]

A myriad of emotions flashed across Isaac's features as Addison spoke. There were so many responses he had to give, though he remained silent. He'd let the girl have her say before attempting to salvage some semblance of order and reason from this entire encounter. He felt as though the conflicting thoughts and feelings were pulling him in a hundred different directions to the point where it seemed he was mere seconds away from snapping.

In an instant it all melted away. Isaac looked to Addison with an expression of near shock lingering on his visage. Throughout the roller coaster the brief reunion had been, only one sensation stubbornly refused to fade or be overwhelmed by other emotions. It remained in the background, steadily building until it threatened to take over. It didn't matter where Addison had gone or why. It didn't matter that she had left him when they were just kids. Left him to scour their neighborhood in vain, desperately searching in hopes of finding her again. None of it mattered. Not anymore.

"Addie I-" He trailed off again. Still incapable of fully putting his thoughts or feelings into words. He looked to her, studied her gaze. There was a familiar sense of warmth and comfort to be found in her deep, blue eyes. "I don't care." He finally pushed the words out. He moved forward to quickly scoop the much smaller Addison up into a rough, yet caring embrace. "I missed you Addie."

[Addison Sloane]

For a moment, Addison thought Isaac would turn around and walk away. In that moment, she seized up and was ready to get down on her knees to beg him not to go. How could she be so desperate for his attention and yet want nothing to do with him for fear of him eventually leaving her?

A small squeak came from the small musician when she was pulled into a hug that so resembled what she used to get when they were younger. Then, it had just been a jumble of bones poking every which way. Now, with a lot more padding on both of them, it felt amazing. And it was warm, and familiar and it felt like home.

Addison pulled her arms out and circled it around his neck before burying her face against the crook of his neck, a sob softly playing at her lips. "I missed you too." She whimpered. Years of being indifferent towards physical contact seemed to wash away as she was made to realise that Isaac...he wasn't going anywhere. He didn't care about what happened. She didn't know if that meant he forgave her but it meant he wanted to be here. He wanted her to be here. Of course, it didn't kill her fears completely but in this moment, nothing mattered.