Pick Up Off The Floor

[Ellen Banks]

Well, this was a mistake. Ellen would have thought if she knew what Franc was thinking, she would have never come here in a million years if she knew that's what he thought of her. Weakness. Pity. Fear. Ellen rather he just spin squarely into her face then show weakness to get that over riding opinionof her.

She swore if his mouth so much as formed the words "I'm sorry" Ellen had a cup full off piping hot coffee that's ready to go over his stupid sympathetic face at a moment's notice...

"Oh wonderful, so now you're a parrot" Ellen retorted back sighing to herself caught believing she

...That was her nature...

Ellen's eyes flickered upwards when Franc mentioned his mom, it was funny after hearing Franc talk about his mother how similar their situations were, especially considering how long Ellen had been a daddy's girl craving his affection for her entire life.

And it didn't take a genius to figure out what Franc was referring to "I assume...these things that happened, did they stem from the fact that...y'know...you're...out"

Who'd have thought it. Franc actually might be able to know what Ellen is going through.

...Unfortunately her father wasn't in France

[François Laffont]

Yes, Franck did pity her but he also knew it was best not to show it. The pity he felt made him want to be nicer on her and try to see if there was indeed a heart underneath all that hauteur she showed. He didn’t get why she had to be so snobbish all the time. He got now that it was more like a defense mechanism of hers but he didn’t think it was a good one. Sure, Franck might end up hurt more often than she was for trusting people so much. But he could also tell he had more fun. He’d take that over shutting himself away from the world anytime.

Of course, for every two steps he made forward with Ellen, she had to push him back one. Or maybe the numbers were scrambled here. Who knows? But it was not easy and any sarcasm coming from her forced Franck to ignore whatever he was feeling from her to go deep inside himself and pour out all the patience and understanding there. She was lucky he had loads of it. He only needed to know if he had more of it than she had of snarky comebacks.

Something caught her attention when he shared his little tale. For the first time, Franck felt like they were going somewhere. She didn’t even say his case was nothing like hers because his mother was not around. Something he would have expected her to say. No. Instead, she asked if that had to do with him being out. He shifted a little on his seat. “In a way. It didn't help for sure. When she caught me kissing that boy... I mean, it was innocent, we weren’t even doing it out of love, just to try it... but that didn't go well. And then my power showed up and... My parents are not mutants like yours. To her, it was an abomination. I was no longer her good little boy.” He looked down, not wanting to get emotional in front of Ellen. She would see only weakness in that. But no matter how much he claimed he went over it, and he did believe that he did, it still hurt. He figured it would only the day he’ll stop caring for his mother and he was not seeing that day coming anytime soon.

Her question brought up another though. “Is that why things are hard? Because you might be gay?” Hey, he remembered what he got from her when she was around Erika.

[Ellen Banks]

Bell really didn't know that she was being offensive...well, ok she supposed her words won't Frank Cox level of sweetness, but Ellen was still learning how exactly the whole nice thing was meant to work and she was an uncharacteristically slow learner. It was a long process to undo years of being the queen bitch of Bellefonte Academy

But she was getting there...

Ellen could sense that this was something of a difficult subject for Franc. How could it not be? Ellen knew for a fact was a terrifying prospect to even the strongest of person, at least with parents like Ellen and Franc was raised with..

Ellen was quite frankly disappointed, She had hoped Franc would be able to provide advice that would numb the pain of actually coming out, since clearly he was quite open about his sexuality, but clearly he didn't have the typical coming out process and his parents just found out via accident. Quite a stupid one at that. Ellen would rather die at that age then let her natural curiosity get the better of her. "Was it worth it?" Ellen asked eyebrow raised.

Ellen didn't say anything for a moment. Tapping her fingers against the cup tongue rooted against the roof of her mouth as if afraid of what might come out with. There was no might about it. Ellen was about as attracted to men as Franc was attracted to her, but that was something he seemed to guess a long time again. "Things used to be so simple, just so easy but now...." Ellen bit her tongue. No, she won't get emotional. She won't speak out of turn, not to him. Not to anyone, she won't let this overwhelm her "I've tried to hold it back....I tried to just bury it down. I tried...Not to be...You know, but it won't. Go away," Ellen admitted through gritted teeth, fustration clear on her face. She can control every other aspect of her life so why couldn't she control who she was attracted too "All I want it is to make it go away

[François Laffont]

Ellen seemed disappointed by his story but sadly for her Franck had no other to give to her. It was what happened. His mother found out like this and couldn’t take it. He had wished it happened differently. He was not prepared at all to tell them, he didn’t even know himself. But it happened and Franck could not turn back time. “Was the kiss worth it? I don’t know... It was pleasant of course, but at that time, I just had no idea that I liked boys, you know? I...” Franck stopped talking, yet his mouth was open as if ready to say something. He just didn't know how to express it right. “I would have preferred she found out when I was sure of myself, when I found out I was gay and accepted it, but it didn't end up like this. Maybe it’s best she found out though. She took very badly that I am a mutant as well and I don’t think I would have been able to be perfectly honest with her about who I am otherwise.” Still, if she was waiting for comfort, for some sort of happy ending where mother and son reunited, she was up for even more disappointment.

“I’m afraid I don’t really have good advice. If your... if your father is anything like my mother, he would not take it well at all, might never. But my father accepted it. Sure, I know he still wished someday I might fall for one really manly girl but he also knows he doesn’t want to lose me just because I prefer boys.” He knew it wouldn’t be of much comfort to her though. If she loved her father as much as Franck loved his mother, the pain would always be there knowing this part of their life could not be accepted.

“You can’t bury it down or make it go away, Ellen, it’s who you are. You can pretend all you want but that’s all it will be. I’m not saying it’s easy all the time. Even I don’t always feel comfortable about it. But attraction, it’s not something you can control. You either learn to accept it or you hide it. I can’t tell you which one will bring you less pain but you should at least be honest with yourself.” Yes, Franck figured it out a little while ago. Ellen could try to hide it to everyone, even to herself, but what he sensed when she protected Erika in the past was pretty clear to him. It might just be a little crush though. He didn’t think it made her a lesbian. Maybe she loved both genders, maybe it was just Erika. But it was there. And she apparently started to realise it was there as well, and what it meant.

[Ellen Banks]

This type of thing had a way of getting out, that's what Ellen learned in recent months, Ellen spent half of her adult life trying to get away from it, burying it down deep and trying to run away from it as much as she could, but sexuality has the unfortunate side effect of being something of a sticky subject to shake. and God knows Ellen did everything she could to deny it and try to enforce the idea of heterosexuality in herself, trying her best to get intimate with boys but....nothing...she felt nothing whatsoever and when she even had the briefest connection with a girl....it was just couldn't be more different, so instead Ellen tried to hide it...

...but that was maybe even worse then her original tactic.... "Let me guess?" Ellen drawled leaning forward her arms pressing against the table "she's one of those overly religious types, mutants are some kind of abomination, some kind of afront to God" Ellen pressed her lips together thinly "Couple that with your sexual choice and you're pretty much any religious mother's worse night mare aren't you?"

That look quickly faded away from her face once she began to compare his own mother to Ellen's father, her eyes flickered upwards towards him for a moment "There's no one like my father..." She left it like that...Should she bother explaining the facts to him? No, he wouldn't understand anyway. How could she?How could she possibly get him to understand?

Besides he probably felt the fear waft off her...

Ellen didn't say anything for a long moment after Franc dependence his advice, Ellen's body language stiffened for a moment before slowly melting as she absorbed and considered her words "Is this why people come to you? These pearls of wisdom?" Ellen tutted as if she wasn't looking for exactly that. Advice. She had about two people she could talk to about this with and it did feel kind of nice "....You know what I'm talking about" Ellen suddenly spoke up "Don't you?"

What she was really asking was "Do I need to say it out loud?"

[François Laffont]

Hearing it said like that sure gave a terrible image of his mother. Yet this was also a true one. He nodded to Ellen. “I don’t think she knew mutants existed before. But that mixed with my... attraction to guys, yes...” He sighed heavily. He was indeed his mother’s worst nightmare now. Franck never being really good at hiding his emotions, he let Ellen see how it hurt him still. It didn’t last too long, he forced himself to focus on her and what she was sharing with him, but she could still notice it.

“He is that bad?” Franck never met Ellen’s parents but he doubted a girl could have this many issues with the world and herself without the help of her parents. The way she talked of her father, he had the feeling she was a daddy’s little girl, or once was or wished to be. Just like he used to with his mother. What he sensed from her had him frown however. Was that what another empath would get from him when he thought of his mother? That was... he had no words to describe it and he had to use all the control within himself not to react to it. She might do a relatively good job at keeping as much of a poker face on, but her feelings were screaming on the inside and Franck didn’t want to reflect them.

She tried to come back at him. At this point, this looked more like a defense mechanism than her being genuinely mean. “I can’t make a decision for you. All I can do is telling you how it was for me and what I got from it. Whether it helps or not... in the end, it’s your life. Even if I was to tell you ‘do that’ or ‘say that’, it’s your choice to make,” he told her, shrugging. She was still reluctant to admit it though. She even asked him if she really had to say it out loud. “You don’t, but one day, you’ll have to admit it. At least to yourself,” he pointed out. “I never meant for the whole school to know me as the friendly gay boy. It’s part of who I am, like the fact that I have blue eyes or that I’m French, but that’s not all I am or the part that matters the most. It’s the same for you. Just... you don’t have to say it, until you’re ready to say it.”