It's Everything You Wanted

[Olivia Chance]

"I...I don't really know yet. I'm just trying to...get over it. Selina kind of tried to get it through my thick skull that I wasn't responsible, but I don't know. I don't know what to think. I guess I kind of get it. It's like...a whipping boy, kind of?" She sighed.

"I've thought about it a bit I guess. But mostly I'm afraid for my sisters. I wish I knew whether they were safe or not." She shook her head and tried to shake it off.

"For all the ideas my brother got into my head about it being my own fault, I also kind of realize now that while he was hurting me, he wasn't hurting my sisters." Olivia looked at Beth, her brow creasing slightly.

"Is it wrong to sort of feel pride in that? That I kind of protected them? Is that weird? I didn't feel like that while it was happening, but...I dunno..."

[Beth Young]

"Well," she began, pursing her lips. "I do understand how it feels as if it was your own fault, because that's what you spent all that time thinking. The situation was presented in a way where you thought your brother did what he did, because you did something wrong." She looked over at the girl, her brows furrowing. "But it's important to remember that even if you had done something wrong, that kind of behavior is unacceptable. No one should be allowed to do something to your body without your permission."

"if you want, I could make some calls?" she asked, looking over at the girl. She could always contact the social office in the town the girl was from, and ask them to go check up on the family and voice her concerns. Maybe some action could be taken.

"No, of course not," she replied, smiling at the younger girl. "It's a good thing, too, that you can see something positive come out of this, even if the situation wasn't deserved, nor something any kid should have to go through."

[Olivia Chance]

Beth was offering to make some calls. She shook her head...but she was conflicted. She wanted to know if they were safe, but she also didn't want to stir things up. For them, for Beth, for herself. She punched the ground beside her.

"Dammit! I can't even make sense of my own emotions. How would I be able to keep track of someone else's! Then Martin wonders why I'm so quick to dismiss the idea of a relationship." She sighed and shook her head, frustration showing clearly on her face.

"I hate not being in control of my life. Or my emotions. Or...or...or ANYTHING. I can't even get my damn POWERS RIGHT!" The water sprang from the lake and turned into a small water tornado nearby, reacting to her emotions. She was in a tumult and she didn't like it. Tears streamed down her face. She didn't know exactly why she was crying. It was partly Connor. Partly her lack of control. But she dealt with those things. She was okay. But this? This wasn't 'okay'. This was anything but the wanted feeling of 'okay'.

[Beth Young]

"Part of being a teenager is being confused about ones emotions. It's a part of being adult too," she said as she offered the girl a reassuring smile. After all, it took people a great amount of time to learn how to properly know themselves and least of all, their emotions. Emotions didn't make sense, and it made the usually realistic world seem incredibly surrealistic.

Reaching her arm out as the girl started losing control over her emotion, Beth placed her arm around her shoulders and focused in on the girl's ability, placing the block, and unless the girl started fighting against it, she would slowly feel her power drain away from her body, and with it, the tornado. And even if she did fight against it, Beth was a lot more adept with her ability than the girl was.

"As much as I understand the feeling of frustration, getting mad isn't going to solve anything. No one can solve all the problems in the world just by wanting to. It takes a great deal of effort, patience and time." She gave the girl's shoulders a nudge, smiling warmly as she did.

[Olivia Chance]

One moment she was crying and having Beth tell her confusing emotions were a part of being a teenager.

The next she was still as a statue. Petrified even. She didn't like not having control of her powers, but when their reaction to her emotions went away and Olivia could no longer feel the undercurrent of her powers, she looked at Beth with horror. Even though the woman had been being friendly with her, thinking nothing of it. Olivia couldn't help but slide a little bit away from the counselor.

"I...I..." Her hands were shaking visibly and most definitely involuntarily.

"My powers...where...where are they? They...where are they wherearetheywherearetheywherearethey?" A few tears cascaded down her cheeks. For all the fuss she made about not being able to control them, they were much like a security blanket for the girl. Knowing they reacted to her emotions meant that she was safe. If her emotions were ever tumultuous while someone was attacking her, her powers would protect her. That gave her a feeling of security. A feeling of security that she suddenly found horribly lacking. Where were her powers? She didn't understand.

[Beth Young]

A hand up came up to squeeze the girl's shoulder. "Don't worry. You haven't lost them," she began, tilting her head so she could properly look at the girl. "When I noticed you started losing control, I suppressed them," she explained, a hand gesturing towards herself. "That's my ability; I can temporarily suppress other people's powers."

She offered the girl an apologetic smile. "I didn't mean for it to frighten you." Slowly, she allowed the power to sink back into the girl. Little by little to avoid overwhelming the already emotional young girl. She let her power slink away from the girl, and she'd feel her power increasing second by second.

She'd rather not have it come as a shock and cause the girl's power to erupt, after all, and she doubted that would do either of them any good. "Remember to take deep breaths."

[Olivia Chance]

Olivia breathed a sigh of relief when she was reassured that her powers weren't gone. And then logic kicked in again.

"I guess...there's not really anyone who can take away our powers or people who didn't like their powers would probably be human again. So I guess I looked pretty stupid just then." She looked sheepishly down at the hands in her lap.

"It's just...my powers are everything to me. I love them. It's always hard for me to fathom people not liking their powers because even when I can't control them, they react to how I'm feeling. They're like my own personal security system. And...I don't want to go back to living like I'm walking on eggshells. My whole life's been like that."

[Beth Young]

"No, it's quite natural to fear they're gone for good the first times around," Beth smiled. After all, this girl was hardly the first who had reacted with fear. "It takes some getting used to," she assured the girl.

Nodding slowly at the words, Beth remained silent until the girl had finished. She then turned to look at the girl for a moment. "It's important to remember that coming into your powers is a new experience, and not everyone knows how to handle suddenly being something they first thought impossible." She looked out over the water then. "You're suddenly pulled from one life to another where the rules aren't the same as you were used to. You're suddenly more than just a hormonal teenager. You're a hormonal teenager with powers you can barely control."

She looked at the girl then. "It's not as easy for everyone."

[Olivia Chance]

"Well it's not so easy for me either. I keep blowing up water fountains by accident, and shattering vases full of flowers. But it's kind of a blessing that they aren't as hard to manage as some. I have enough issues in this screwed up head of mine without adding malfunctioning and unruly powers to the mix. But I know some people have a lot of trouble. That's why I've been researching powers like crazy. Yeah, they're interesting. But when I get to college, I think I'm going to major in stuff like that. I'll be able to help people having trouble that way." She ducked her head. She hadn't even really admitted that to Zoe yet.

[Beth Young]

Beth's brows furrowed slightly as the girl kept referring to herself as 'screwed up in the head', but she supposed they could talk about that another time. The girl was actively looking forward to and planning the future. That was good. That meant she hadn't given up and that she was ready to move forward.

"That's good," she said, smiling as she leaned back on her elbows. "We need more people who study that." She offered the girl a warm smile. "You should check out one of the labs and maybe talk to one of the college students who already study that subject. There isn't many of them, but I'm sure they could be able to offer a little more insight." After all, you could never be too prepared and it was always nice to have someone else's perspective on things.

[Olivia Chance]

Her eyes widened.

"Like actually talk to people in the subject? Aw crap no. I'm not good at talking to people. There's no doubt I'd mess that up badly. I read the books, do my best to understand them. Other people though? No matter how much studying I do on people, they still seem to remain a great mystery." She sighed.

"That said, I don't even know where to start. I don't know who's taking those courses so even if I tried to meet them, we'd probably miss each other every time I tried."

[Beth Young]

"Practice makes perfect," she simply commented. After all, how did the girl plan on getting any better if she stopped herself from even trying? "Besides, in that field of work, you're going to have to get used to talking to people. After all, that's usually where people go when having questions about their powers." She looked over at the girl and wondered if she'd done any research on the actual job, and not just what the job was about.

Her question was quickly answered though. It didn't seem as if the girl knew much beyond "they study the schematics of powers". Issuing a light chuckle, Beth smiled. "Then it sounds to me like you have some research to do." She'd offer to help, but clearly, there was certain things this girl needed to do on her own.

[Olivia Chance]

"I've already done lots of research. I devoured everything in every textbook available...oh wait you mean research on the job it leads to. Yeah I guess." She rubbed the back of her neck with a slight chuckle.

"I know I need to get used to talking to people, but they can be so judgy sometimes. I'm friends with Zoe, and that's good enough for me right now. Is it wrong to limit myself so much I wonder?"

[Beth Young]

Smiling warmly, Beth nodded. She saw little point in confirming. The girl was in no way stupid. Maybe a little rash and uncoordinated, but she'd likely grow out of that. She was still young, after all.

"No, you shouldn't force yourself. Take the time you need and when you're ready, it'll come to you," she smiled. After all, forcing yourself could in the long run, do much more harm than good. "But don't let fear stop you either," she said, a thin smirk playing on her lips. "People often regret the chances they didn't take more than the ones they do."

[Olivia Chance]

"I already know that you regret things if you don't step up. Even if it hurts to remember, I will never regret my past. And if I can not regret that, then the rest of my life...well that will be a piece of cake I think." She sighed. It still hurt her to think of her past. But now that the initial shock of all her memories flowing back had hit her, it was more of a numb sort of pain.

"Will it ever go away I wonder?" She was mostly musing to herself, but she realized she'd said it aloud.

"I mean...the pain of remembering."